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  • tortoise 1d

    the Loan

    your smile is a lie,
    let me ask you, "why"?
    it feels a lot,
    like a vodka shot,
    for all we've got,
    has gone to rot.

    your smile is a lie,
    and your hum is shy.
    it hurts like hell,
    when you're not well,
    still people do sell,
    their decisive shell.

    your smile is a lie,
    it's expression, wry.
    but don't feel alone,
    for mine is equally gone,
    so let us all moan,
    while we repay our loan.

    ~ the loan we took to be born.

    ©tortoise

  • tortoise 2d

    What's yellow?
    failure, mixed with a tinge of hope.

    ©tortoise

  • tortoise 4d

    they say,
    how temporary our existence is.
    look at the clouds above.
    they are fluffy white balls, rolling in the sky, as if some dog yawning and stretching lazily onto the grass.
    the dog is dead, yet the clouds roll.

    can you smell this whiff?
    every year, around this time,
    of festivities, this smell encircles us.
    a little scent of incense stick, mixed with the aroma of busting crackers, and delicacies prepared at home, tell you that not only celebration tastes good, but smells good too.
    grandma's no more, yet her fragrance is.

    they tell you, how nature has always been here. the sky, the earth, the fire, the rain. from the beginning of the life, to the end of the time, and it will still persist, because it's the fittest. always ready to adapt, and learn.
    "but Ravana was killed centuries ago, why do we need to do it every year, mumma? is he also the fittest?"
    "i guess, yes, he's the part of nature too. we all try to kill it every year, to pacify ourselves, with the thought that the Good wins over the Evil."
    "does that mean, the 'goodness' is also the nature?"
    "ofcourse, it is. that's why they both persist, along with the mighty Nature, son!"

    "why do we celebrate Dussehra, papa?"
    The sky was lit with fairy lights, and crackers were celebrating the win of Lord Rama, like every year. Only his mother wasn't there to tell his daughter the same story, he had learnt from her. He bent over to take his daughter in his mighty arms, and took her to the terrace to tell her what his parents had once taught him. The stars of her eyes, shone brighter than the stars in the sky!

    ©tortoise

  • tortoise 5d

    let we never become any hindrance to someone's joy and peace!

    @miraquill @writersnetwork
    thank you WN for another repost! ❤️

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    You're Right!

    you feel hurt, don't you?
    and, a little pain, deep in your chest?
    ofcourse, life is hard,
    may be a little more for you.

    last week, while tossing between the cases, a new case knocked my brain. a girl in her teens, with a rare disease, called "intermediate uveitis". her only concern was to, at least, slow down the progress of disease, else she'd lost vision from both eyes. And, when i ask her, how does the disease affect her, on emotional level, she answered, "the disease doesn't affect me, i just want to study, and become a good CA." because, the condition doesn't let her study for more than half an hour at a stretch, without pain and burning in her eyes, with vertigo and blackouts. it was her father who told about her academic success, and how she topped her tenth examination, despite suffering the maximum during that time. i always thought, how much struggle i do, with studying and working and everything in between, for my career is a never ending journey. She slapped me, right on the face, to let me know, what struggle actually looks like.

    yesterday while traveling, i shut my eyes closed, for i was hugely tired. only when, someone's laughter hindered my peace. A girl in her early twenties, was struggling to remove her mask, to click a selfie. Immediately, i thought, how stupid it is for people to find joy, in clicking pictures, when there's a lot she can do in her age. It was visibly difficult for her to hold phone and scarf and her bag to manage from her right hand. it annoyed me a little, why isn't she holding one of the item with her left hand, when God has given all of us two hands, for she might drop her phone. only when i saw, how her left forearm was amputated. I was slapped again, right on my face, to judge people for what they do, without knowing their why's. Everyone has a right to be happy, even amidst all the pain they suffer. And if their joy comes from clicking selfie, who am i to deny that? She was indeed a strong woman, to single handedly manage her life, to be really apt.

    and, if you feel,
    i wrote it down, to undermine
    your pains and your sufferings,
    trust me, that's not my aim.

    this is to remind you,
    that everyone struggles.
    and the least we can do,
    is to be kind.
    not only to others,
    but to ourselves too.

    more often than not,
    we fail to realise,
    how blessed and lucky we're.
    so don't let all your focus,
    onto what's going wrong,
    when it's you, who's going right!

    ©tortoise

  • tortoise 1w

    when you both understand each other, even without speaking, anything!

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    To understand a place,
    it's important to live there.
    Be it my city,
    or, his heart!

    ©tortoise

  • tortoise 1w

    @miraquill @writersnetwork

    the harder i try to stop spreading love, the harder it becomes to be me.

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    The Melting Love

    Sometimes, i feel so weak,
    in my heart.
    in my bones.
    in my brain. And,
    stupid too,
    to have loved
    so much, and to
    so many.

    The more you love,
    the more it aches.
    Yet, everytime, i tried
    to turn cold, to everyone
    and to everything,
    happiness failed to knock
    my door. Though,
    sadness forgot my address,
    for a while too.
    Since warmth is the only joy,
    it can't come without melting.
    To melt, is to bring pains
    and let the love flow.
    The more it aches,
    the better you feel,
    the better you heal.
    For pains k-e-e-p us humane.

    Sometimes, i feel so strong,
    in my heart.
    in my bones.
    in my brain. Though,
    stupid too,
    to have loved
    so much, and to
    so many.

    ©tortoise

  • tortoise 1w

    #grandma #300th
    extremely grateful to you @writersnetwork for your amazing reposts, you've given me, everytime i felt down.
    and @miraquill for my pod post!
    (Another time, Editor's choice! grateful.)

    thank you to my cute friends, for being there all the time, and reading my stupid posts, with your everGreen appreciations!

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    isn't miraquill a place, lot like your grandma's house? you come here, in vacation, to vent out what has been killing you all the time. it feeds you thoughts, even when you say you're full. it takes away your stress, with its pampering appreciations, and amazing stories.

    like, your grandma's kitchen, it has got all the flavours to satisfy your tongue, while keeping your health a priority. somedays, it gets messy, just like the annoyance of a grandma, yet you stay, as long as you can, because you know, how good it feels to be here. it ensures your safety, and cleans up your heart while you pen down your own self.

    it's my 300th day, at my granny's place! and i still feel, the vacation isn't over yet. i look back, to my first day, and the joy is still the same! i have to leave this grandma's home, often, yet i am always welcomed, open heartedly, everytime i come. it's wondrous to see all my previous growths, and the kind of me, i was initially, and what i have changed to.

    all my shades, still hung here, for my grandma's place, is my another home!

    ©tortoise

  • tortoise 2w

    i love you,
    like you love me.
    and we can't do anything about it.
    can we?

    you went away far,
    like soldiers on war.
    i sat here alone,
    letting my grief, moan.

    you think it's just fine,
    to allow our hearts dine.
    but only if you hadn't dreams,
    you'd had heard my screams.

    i told you thrice,
    i miss you, Mr. Wise!
    my heart is insane,
    wanna run your lane.

    i know, you miss me too,
    for your love is all true.
    it's just sometimes i feel,
    love is hard to deal.
    you've got passion and zeal,
    like the sky colored teal.
    but we haven't yet put a seal,
    i fear someone might steal,
    what we have, as shown in reel.

    i have fought with Him,
    when i couldn't be with you.
    i have thanked Him enough,
    when i finally got you!
    and so i have left us, onto Him,
    for destinies know our love too!

    ©tortoise

  • tortoise 2w

    #katuata @miraquill thankyou so much @writersnetwork for your likelihood
    5-7-7 (19 syllables).

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    do you hear me, love?
    i am all up for your touch.
    your soul hasn't send vibes yet!

    ©tortoise

  • tortoise 3w

    प्रेम का होना..

    मैंने हमेशा सोचा था, कि प्रेम का होना ही काफी होता है। बस ये जान लेना कि, वे आपसे उतना ही प्रेम करते हैं जितना की आप, या शायद थोड़ा ज़्यादा, इसी खुशी में ज़िंदगी बिताई जा सकती है। हैरान हूं, ये महसूस करने पर, कि ये बात कितनी गलत है।

    प्रेम का होना ही काफी नहीं होता, दो लोगों को आपस में जोड़े रखने के लिए। हालाकि प्रेम के होने से आप कभी अपनी राहें जुदा नहीं करते, या कभी करनी भी पड़े तो कहीं ना कहीं एक तसल्ली रहती है हृदय में, कि हम दोनों ही प्रेमी थे, एक दूजे के। इससे तकलीफ़ कितनी कम हो जाती है, ये कहना ज़रा कठिन है।

    ज़िंदगी जिस तरह की रोलर कोस्टर राइड है, उससे कुछ भी अपेक्षा रखना व्यर्थ है। लेकिन अपनों से तो आप आशाएं रखते हैं, कि चाहें दिन कितना भी ख़राब हो, उनका होना ही आपके दिन को खुशनुमा बना सकता है। सिर्फ़ उनका होना।

    क्या ये बहुत बड़ी उम्मीद है? जो वायदा करते हैं, आपसे बेपनाह प्रेम करने का, उनसे आप इतना तो चाह ही सकते हैं, कि वे आपके लिए रहें। चाहें कुछ ना बोलें, कुछ ना करें, लेकिन बने रहें, आपके समीप, आपको ये बताने के लिए, कि उनका रहना ही उनके अनंत प्रेम का साक्ष्य है।

    शायद, किसी ने सही ही कहा है, करनी कथनी से ताकतवर होती है। और महज़ बोल देना, वो तीन लफ्ज़, किसी भी रिश्ते को टूटने से तो बचा सकता है, पर उसे जीवित नहीं रख सकता। आजकल ऐसे रिश्ते टॉक्सिक माने जाते हैं, जहां आप एक दूसरे को चोट पहुंचाते रहते हैं, लेकिन एक दूजे के साथ रहते हैं, प्रेम के नाम पर।

    शायद प्रेम समझना कठिन है। शायद प्रेम बुद्धि का विषय ही नहीं है, जो समझ में आ पाए। यह तो एक्सट्रीम फीलिंग्स से लैस एक ऐसा जादू है, जिसे यदि सही से करने वाला जादूगर का साथ मिल जाए, तो एक धमाकेदार शो किया जा सकता है। जैसे कृष्ण ने किया था, राधा से। शायद इसीलिए, उन्हें आज तक ईश्वर समझा जाता है। जबकि वे हैं केवल सच्चे प्रेमी, भावपूर्ण आशिक, और कर्मठ सखा!

    ©tortoise