Simmering in the wind is my Mortality,And am afraid of it,So much so that I protect the candle in it,Thinking more ofThe melting waxThan the glowing light. -F
The core of all downward spiralsIs that one old craving,You developed over timeThen lived in it for the pleasure Of watching,how it destroys your life.It's like theSleep that comesAfter having battled and lost atAll attempts of sleeping. The only stimulant leftWhen nothing else can Stimulate you,Self destruction?A drunk man tries to tell his truth,People dont believe, cos he is drunk, Eventually he ends up lieing,People dont believe that either.After multiple imitations of yourself In society,You try once in a while to break that Mirror,For your instinct its liberation,For reason, that's destruction. The field of mud left by you,From these instincts just grow and growAnd you swivel in it deeper,You may ignore it, deny it,Even accept the venom you are,But, your body has memorized it,Wanting it to unlearn is likeMaking a particular political partyLearn secularism. But is there an escape?Maybe, somewhere like a myth.You sure do can dream about yourself Without destruction,Like the millions, who still dream about 'Ache din'.-F.
You emit from my laps,Watching the sun set onA forlorn shore,Strand of a hair from your neck,And I peck a salt there,My hold strengthens orYour soul softens?Reaching a point from where chaos Is subtle but adamant,I think and thinkYou feel and feel,We need this moment orOr the moment, our bodies hope?I adjust myself andYou become self aware,Needing and avoidingThem naked affirmations.We look at the drowned sun,Somewhere I feel,Love running in my veins,Somewhere, the same happenedTo to your preface.I'm searching this 'somewhere',Almost everywhere. -RoulefFe
He is in denial, he has died,He had no human contact andHence was so comfortable in the afterlife
The onus of growing up in a globalized 2000sWas to take an identity of modern man,One who had the moral compass of west,A feminist, leftist, agnostic,Intellectual, spiritual, liberal;And It's not like the place I grew up inDid not have any personalites to offer;Local masculinity, being judgemental,Misogyny, narrow mindedness ,caste,Relegion and many more.Then there were neutral ones too:Of Love, sex, marriage, family,Introvert, extrovert, ambivert,Bollywood and live in the moment.In short, I had so many personalities,I was overqualified for schizophrenia.The trap of living your entirityFor an idea is that you are going against The natural order of existence,Because existence is not based on anyFucking idea,It just exists.In the end, when the idea and identity Loses it's high,You end up wounded and toxic.The question is why we need it?Why we survive of it?It helps us, connect-Fulfilling our prophecy of Being a social animal,Forming herds and groups,Friends and partners,Forming a society.Society which in itself is...-F
The haste of the wanting to heal is my impatience, But healing always takes time and now is the beginning. I ache to empower meI ache to be my best and dominate the worldCos I was the one who was suppressed all his life.My judgement of me is the worse curse.My ache has to be uprooted in a desire,And my insecurities and the strong beleif that I cant be or can't do things is limiting me.My lack of trust is My need to protect myself, But guess what I dont need a protection anymore.I don't need to protect me because I m totally safe.
I feel disgusted by the fact that I have to pick that call,Hear to hearsay and indulge on an attack.I want to control and dominate her,Am not happy that she is growing,As if the miserable her is my feeling of winning,My illusion of control over her,Am incredibly lost in love which turned to apathy.I m insecure and perverted on my stand abs status as a manThere is a deficit of trust which she cant fill in,There is a deficit of trust cos my heart is broken,There is a position of passion and negetive elation,A feeling of gleam and disgust and unhealthy vibes,I blame her for my moronic disabilities,My inferiority complex,My grasp of reality.Well on fact, it's my wound and I have to heal.
Inhibitions come alive in me,My tensions rise,My inabilities as a person show meThe rotting hell on my social life,My inadequacies, my focus, My gibberish banter with me, My inquisitive aloofnessMy scare of being tongue tiedAnd humiliated infront of all,It's all there,Also there is my light weight fightBut when I fight hardcore, My fight is obscure.For an eventuality that's neverAs I desired,For the social game, I never played,Either I have to accept I have to be political with everyone .
She is a hot lava, a baby a beautiful fairy Also my love, my destinyI can't run awayMy thoughts need her,An organ that never goes But my fight here is not against herBut against her impotent faithI despise her guilt and anxietyAlso pity that a lot,She is my womanShe is also hot,I wish I could cast off her physicality And look it deep down,Cast off her physicality And see her childThe child is in lot of painShe needs to heal.I got victimized by second guessing By being an umpire.I m resigning from the job,I m also not a satire,I m the deep fire,I m just that.