just another me trying to live...

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  • shelagh77 7w

    Could I have ever thought

    Every morning I awake
    To lose more
    More of my feelings
    More of hope and more of you
    Sad as it is
    I feel not sad at the thought
    The thought of you not in my life
    Because now being alone feels way peaceful and happy
    Never could I have thought that letting go is what I needed all along..

  • shelagh77 14w

    Who am I?

    I am trying to figure out when I got lost
    When I became numb
    When I became powerless
    I look in the mirror and am a stranger
    I can't recognize the person I have become
    I let you walk over me like a homeless dog
    I let you hurt me and I forgive you just to watch you do it again

    Where is the real me?
    I think she walked out on me when she realised I was drowning
    Drifting into the winds and weathering away into a timid, scared and naive girl in love

  • shelagh77 21w

    Times change

    Its funny how this time last year you promised me the world
    I meant heaven to you. Well at least that's what you told me
    Here u are. It's our anniversary but all I ask myself is what am I doing in this bed with you right now

  • shelagh77 30w

    I am quiet not because I have nothing to say.
    But because I run out of what to say.
    The more I complain, the more I got to realise there is nothing left of you that I like.
    So I seat here watching and waiting for when
    I get the courage to move and lock you in the past where you actually belong.

  • shelagh77 34w

    I need the courage to walk away for good because even God knows that we are not meant to be
    So why am I here waiting for you to tell me what is obvious to everyone.

  • shelagh77 37w

    The I that I am turning out to be doesn't yet reflect the I that I want to be.
    So am stuck trying to figure I out despite the errors I am causing

  • shelagh77 37w

    Make belief

    I have tried to go all in
    Love you with all I am
    Put my ego on a bench
    Told myself that u are worth it
    Move in with you

    Does that make me damn?
    Because just again I trusted
    When I promised myself I wouldn't
    I fell off a cliff because I knew you would catch me
    I ignored what my friends told me
    What seemed obvious
    Funny that even I feel so sad
    Sad that I hoped
    This was all make belief
    I feel broken

    But I guess what is life if you never learn
    After all the best lessons are extracted from mistakes
    Because then you know how stupid, used and damn you felt when u chose love

  • shelagh77 40w

    The dreaded friend TIME.

    Here I was all along praising you
    Knowing that you had my back
    But everyday that goes by
    I lose more of you
    I fear that you pass with a person who I love
    With an embrace I can't feel anymore

    You have become more of an enemy than the friend I knew
    You take and take without giving
    And when I think I finally won
    You take those I have to celebrate with
    How I wish you would be kind enough
    And pause
    Pause for a little while so that I get to be happy and successful
    With everyone that I love and care about around to cheer me on

    I don't want to say I hate you TIME
    But I just don't get why everything about you
    Comes with a price.
    To WIN and LOSE
    Like one thing always pays for another.

  • shelagh77 48w

    Yet another starts

    2020 is gone
    And still I haven't figured it out
    The reason for my existence
    The answers to the puzzle
    The year ends when it clocks midnight today
    But am still in the same spot
    The spot where I was last year hoping that all will work out for good
    The year ends and am the same wreck I was years back
    Confused, scared and alone just waiting for what the next year will hit me with.

  • shelagh77 48w

    Word Prompt:

    Write a 6 word short write-up on Obsessed

    Read More

    pulling away is impossible regardless