IN THE END.
All those fears, those insecurities, the fear to all the uncertainities to what the future holds, those sheer moments of retrospect euphoria in which we couldn't have felt anything but the gentle breeze and the purest form of happiness we had, i.e , a SMILE , those thoughts zooming in and out, which we considered only to be incidental and distracting and thus struggled to sidetrack it, but only to later find out that those are just an endless loop inside the head , the pressure from all those well wishers and elders who only will advice us to work hard, read books, getting practical and eventually grow, but not how to deal with the process itself. Those fun, long and never ending convos we used to have but which have since ceased to exist due to some differences or uncertainity, although we still crave for it and constantly keep swiping down in the cute hope for 'that one' notification... that one call.Those terrifying fears of losing out .The humongous workload and yet still the never ending procrastinations. Those retrospects which pops out of nowhere in the wee hours of the day or in the darkest nights, eventually forcing us to feel the guilt or at least on the bright side, be proud. The Social Media influence where we still have the biggest ^deception^ that all our once so called best friends are having the time of their lives and yet we sit on this other side of the screen, sobbing and at the most, liking the posts.
All these insignificant and small moments will eventually just narrow down to this.. One unexpected day, this one moment..where we'll finally run out of all our ideas to deal with these thoughts.. and trust me, my friend, IN THE END, IN ONE OF OUR DARKEST NIGHTS, WE WILL FIND OURSELF LYING THERE ON THE BEDSIDE IN PURE SOLITUDE, CRYING ENDLESSLY AND `THAT'LL BE IT, THAT WILL BE THE ONLY ONE MOMENT WE'LL RELIVE AFTER WHAT SEEMS LIKE ONCE IN A BLUE MOON, WHEREIN WE WON'T HAVE TO HOLD BACK ANY OF THOSE THOUGHTS, EMOTIONS AND BEAT ONESELF UP... ONLY TO JUST LET GO OF OURSELF....
_19th of september, 2020_