Grey Day
How can the world be filled with color if the light has fallen from everybody's eyes?
We all hide behind masks, and opinions. The world see only in either black or white.
Is that statement politically correct anymore?
It's bad enough it's a grey winter, now we're being reminded we have gone a year in this new sort of Hell.
The color drained from everyone's faces, going through the motions and being complacent.
We're all lonely and depressed. Even our families have exceeded their welcome in our presence, their company not good enough for our primal social needs.
I want to live again. I need to love life again.
©miss_lyra
miss_lyra
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miss_lyra 6w
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Alone Time
The extrovert in me is struggling to embrace the quiet time alone.
Too much time in my own thoughts, I'd rather hear someone else's.
I don't want to turn to social media, but staring blankly at my food in a dining hall full of people makes me think I'm attention seeking, that I am screaming, "I AM EATING ALONE" because I don't have a phone companion or headphones in front of my face instead.
I know I am not Alone. I have people who love and care for me, but the walk home is quiet without them.
My mind is not always good company, but neither bad. It's just melancholy, and quiet, refusing to entertain me with provoking thoughts.
I wasn't so extroverted until I was told I wasn't allowed to be.
©miss_lyra -
miss_lyra 16w
CPTSD Awareness
Cold hearted people leave scars when they never put a hand on you.
People who suppress your opinions and emotions are a part of the problem.
Thinking that everything was normal and okay was a lie to yourself.
Stopping the multi generational cycle of abuse is necessary to move on.
Deciding when enough is enough is the first step.
Complex PTSD. Years of emotional and psychological trauma that flew under the radar...
©miss_lyra -
miss_lyra 26w
The Staring Stranger
I didn't recognize her,
she stared back anyways.
But I didn't know her.
She was working so hard to smile
I could tell it hurt her,
her eyes showed sorrow,
pain easily read inside them.
I wanted to help-
but it was impossible.
I couldn't stand there any longer
I walked away,
before I broke the mirror.
To set that girl free
on the other side.
©miss_lyra -
miss_lyra 26w
Life in Love
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Please don’t hang up before I’m through
I like you a little
I like you a lot
if you hand me that cupcake, I’m totally bought
I painted my nails, I curled my hair
you don’t even notice
but all the rest of the boys stand and stare
I figured you out
you’re a difficult one
I won’t stop trying
not till this battle is done
You finally gave in!
To my glorious looks
we’re now dating!
It’s in the books
Senior year is here
as we all know
will you stay with me, or will you go
Good for you!
you chose right
I’m not being sarcastic
Baby, don’t start a fight
College is closing
so are jobs
keep yours honey
if not- *sob,sob*
Time to paint the baby’s room
what color do you like?
come a little closer,
I promise I don’t bite
What’s that in your breath?
Is that Alcohol?
Is that blood on your lip?
Were you in a brawl?
I’m packing my bags
I’m taking Junior too
you’re not safe to be around
I’m sorry, we’re through
You have not paid Child Support
and it’s getting kind of tough
I’m ready to file a report
you deserve to be in cuffs
Junior is 11
he’s been sick since he was 7
we all need you
I admit I have no idea what to do
Junior is getting better
you’re the one he has to thank
you got your act together
if you were not here, his boat would have sank
I’m glad we’re back together
you are such a gentleman
will you help Junior with his paper
I like that application, why don’t you hit send?
We’re at his graduation
We’re at his wedding too
we’re now grandparents!
How lucky are you!
As we watch them grow up
it makes me feel old
feed them cookies, give them a pup,
Isn’t that what grandmothers are told?
my bones are brittle
my joints are creaking
I think you’re growing, little by little
that means I am… shrinking!
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Please tell Junior
that my life is through.
©miss_lyra -
Death of the Party
All these people,
many I don't know.
The ability to zone
conversations out
soothes my secret soul.
I stand near the edges,
not functionally making words flow,
avoiding eye contact
and shying interaction.
Snacks cover the counters,
I don't eat.
Too much glutinous carbs,
but I hear my stomach growl with anticipation
Small talk is pitiful,
and opinions take offence.
To not participate
is my last defense.
Can't trust to take a drink.
If I go out to dance,
A drug being sinked,
There's always a chance.
It's awfully quiet
being reclusive,
solitude can be cold.
Cold as the winter night
outside this window beside me.
©miss_lyra -
miss_lyra 26w
Downfall of the Dancer
Hairspray fills the room
Is that one lost shoe?
Fall off that box and you’re doomed
I missed my part- oh, boo hoo
We go over dances hour after hour
There is no end in sight
Turns fall, legs going weak
Why don’t you take a break- I just might
Costumes on
Hair fixed
four layers of lip balm
I think I might be sick
Show starts
Lights hot
What a work of art
I’m about to go on, wait, STOP!
What happens next I don’t know
I remember a girl…
What a blow
Now my head's in a whirl
Other dancers circle round
Their faces all a blur
I can not hear a sound
Why couldn’t either of us swerve?
The girl I collided with
Is dancing back on stage
There is no music
I find her so brave
I see her face now
Tears streaming down her cheeks
I can’t take my eyes off of her
Even as the gurney squeaks
I wake up. It’s 2pm
Where am I?
I want my family
I need to see them
They tell me something’s wrong
Already sensed that
They say I’m stuck in the hospital
Tell me. Why is that?
Horrific concussion
Broken hips broken heart
Feet mangled
I’m right back at start
Physical therapy
Replace my entire life
Crazy hard stretches
Is it really worth all the strife?
I’m in a black room
Only a single light to be seen
Then it goes off
I wake up with a scream
That dream is back
But no light is on
Lost, in the dark
Forever alone
Advil becomes my leaning post
I leaned too hard
The post broke
I’m definitely not the one to boast
Walls are crumbling
So am I
Sleep engulfs me
Just let me die
I find the light
I hear a voice
‘Come to me’ it says
Doesn’t look like I have a choice
So I was called to church
A new kind of family
A family who doesn’t care
What I do or what I wear
The coach says I’m healed
For some reason I don’t believe him
I won’t ever be the same
I will never begin again
My dream gone for good
Where do I go next
I have lost a piece of my puzzle
I guess this is the real test
©miss_lyra -
miss_lyra 26w
Won Week
How did you do it?
How did you take the worst week of the entire year, and transform it into something so beautiful?
You walked with me though my many challenges, never asking anything in return. I shall repay you. As a damsel who was clearly in distress, you were my knight in shining armor.
In one week, I went from feeling nothing good, to absolutely everything grand.
In the list of people who have turned my life around for the better, you're one of them.
I can never thank you enough for what you have allowed me to do. To speak my mind, to take a whole breath, and to be my genuine self, no take backs.
What's amazing is that you make it look so easy! Listening to me ramble on about my self development. Floods of personal revelations spilling from within-
good thing you know how to use a mop.
It may have only been one week, but within those 10080 minutes, I've never been so certain in a person in my entire life.
In one week, you won me.
©miss_lyra -
Anxie-tea
Anxie-tea is my poison.
Forced down like a shot of whiskey.
Burning at my throat, down to my core.
3rd degree burns coat my insides like glitter on a children's finger painting.
I can no longer swallow my challenges.
My lungs so singed I cannot breathe.
This anxie-tea causing a chemical reaction within me, somehow forcing nervous chuckles to bubble from within, through my cracked lips.
I can't hold food down, so they give me more anxie-tea. By now I am numbed to the pain and clasp the cup in both of my hands, thirsting for anything to soothe these blisters,
more anxie-tea is NOT it.
Only God can be my anecdote.
©miss_lyra -
Water Color Kisses
I want to kiss you like water color.
I want our lips to blend together
like a sunset over the sea.
To fall into your arms, and forget
that a monochrome world surrounds us.
©miss_lyra
