The writer within me just had to find your sweetness For my soul was craving to express poetic meekness Yet once I found you my linguistic voice was alive Giving me an orchestra of poetic beauty now to strive
A magical world of writing flooded my empty existence Like an explosion of beauty in majestic persistence So many writers I met here all gifted all so very sweet Though far apart I may never see them on the street
Mirakee is like the voice of the silent needing to speak I heard the poetic voices of both the strong and weak I joined Sept 2018 making the sweetest of new friends Giving countless comments on which our work depends
Happy birthday mirakee...because of you I found ME Found an army of writers,found poetic freedom definitely Found new friends,found ways to develop my own skills Found out it was created in India whose culture just thrills
Thank you to all those who made my dear heart smile For making my creative language remain for a long while Each post I read is bathed in beauty,heartfelt and true Making me realise you've all made my dream come true
Nobody has never said they hate me before besides my siblings but they’re not serious. I can feel if someone doesn’t like me by the way they act around me. Not everyone will tell you that they hate you because they don’t wanna hurt your feelings. So I just been hurt lately and I’m so tired of worrying what someone thinks of me. Well not actually what think but how they feel about me when I’m around. I’m tired of people who I know unfollowing me or doesn’t follow me back on Instagram. And there are people that I know who doesn’t follow me back and it makes me feel some type of way. It’s like I thought I know them so well but I don’t. I don’t like when everybody in real life just think I’m quiet and that’s all I ever be. I know they didn’t say that but it seems like it to me. I feel like people expect me to be loud and talk a lot. I wish I could but I can’t be someone I’m not. Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I wasn’t afraid to talk to people. Will it be easier for me to make friends? If I can speak louder, would others like me? I don’t know, these questions seems unrealistic but yeah. I feel like deep inside, I want to become a better person who I can be happy with. I don’t mind being quiet, however talking a little more wouldn’t hurt. I really want to change but I want to make sure that I’m doing this for myself and my own happiness. Not for everyone else’s.
Social media is making it worse for my mental health. It’s crazy how on Instagram, people actions can make you feel some type of way. So be careful using Social media because too much is not for your mental health.
I know I haven’t been posting lately. I’ve been trying to focus on myself. Trying to understand myself more. I feel like the pandemic had affect my future plans. I wasn’t able to do things that I wanted to do. But it’s okay, I hope this year, I will be able to do something that never done before In’sha’Allah. Now I’m just focusing on school and God. Learning new things about my religion everyday. I tried reading the Quran everyday to gain more knowledge.
Another thing why I haven’t been posting (I know some of you don’t care but I’m telling you this anyway) is because I had decided not to post pictures with my face in it. Well not this account but my main account. Every time I look at the pictures, the more I feel insecure. I used to love taking pictures but it had always made me look ugly. I know that I am a beautiful human being Alhamdulillah. But the photo itself, makes me look different than I actually do. When I post a pic that I thought was cute but when I stare at it a long time, I ended up deleting it. I be like "Ew why do I look like that?” “Why do everybody likes this, this is so ugly” "Why my pictures are not getting enough likes” -And so on. Ever since I stop taking pictures of myself, I became confident. I don’t feel the need to call myself ugly. It’s crazy how just one picture can affect someone's mood. I don’t have to compare myself to anyone else. It feels like breathing in a fresh new breeze. I realized that not everybody needs to see my face. Except for those who already knows me in real life. And this is also because of religious reasons. Also I don’t like to expose my beauty in front of random guys. I never intended to attract people, it just happens. Some guys just fall you just because of your profile or the pictures you've posted of yourself.
So yeah is my way of loving myself and finding out what works for me. I am planning to post new content this year In’sha’Allah. I’m trying to figure out how to organize my posts. But yeah that’s my life update. I know it’s long but it’s worth to read.
Self-inflicted battle scars serve as reminders. They remind us that when we battle ruthlessly against our own selves, we inflict wounds that can be difficult to heal. The healing balm of self-love can save us though, as it salvages the wreckage of our ailing heart and mind. In time, if we apply it often, self-love reduces the gaping wounds to fading scars; and those are battle scars that we can be proud of, because they show that we learned to stop fighting with ourselves, and start surviving and thriving instead. If the battle of a lifetime leads to a lesson of self-love, then we truly have won the war and proven ourselves the victor. There is no greater glory than that; so wear your scars with pride and teach the importance of self-love to one and all. Copyright Carolyn Glackin 1/9/2021