So I wont be active on here for awhile. Or at least reading and comment consistently. This was hard to write. I had tears in my eyes the whole time. Her name was Rosa. She was a wonderful soul that truly the world need more of. I hope i can grow to be half the person she was. It'll be hard without you! You were the only one to tell me how proud I made you. I hope I can continue to do so. R.I.P. My Queen.
The LAST Grand Rose
It grew from humble grounds where many wouldn't believe a beautiful flower could be found from the time of a seed it was found special it grew roots and broke through hardships as it grew it beautified everything around it its beauty captured many who came to see it the sun seem to give it extra time for even its petals gave off warmth to anyone in need
Cold came but it persevered through winter's trials standing proudly with it petals it shined brilliantly through the snow allowing its kind to see it of a different breed many came to see it because it provided comfort a feeling unlike any other you could feel love through it's very color
Then one day it got called home all of its kin loss their beautiful colors they inherited for it was more than a matriarchal rose to them it was home as the time came it never loss its petals still as beautiful as ever as it withered away may it decorate GOD'S garden now while dew drops falls from our petals now leaving sadness wasnt its choice all of it is from losing our grand rose
If I were to disappear like darkness into the night If I were to disappear like a raindrop into an ocean If I were to disappear like a shooting star would anybody notice my pen being lonely
If I were to crumble to pieces like a dried leaf allowing myself to lay beneath your feet would you try to piece me back or let me lay in defeat
If I were to shine like every other star could you point to me with conviction or would I blend in without any uniqueness
These insecurities of mine are fleeting for I'll disappear into waters of the drowning letting myself sink into the depths of the night I'll disappear like a shooting star burning above the earth in a blaze of self destruction then maybe I'll finally be remembered fondly by you
Sometimes reality can be a nightmare we try to awake from.
The walls are crumbling all around me darkness continues to creep towards me how do I escape this moment when my heart feels like it's going into a deep slumber tears are summoned by dark entities while my hands are tired from gripping reality someone please help me defeat these feelings but no one comes to bring the light into this abyss
The floor starts to waver from my weight I'm falling deeper into insanity's paint covering myself with its colors of madness floating on a driftwood that my floor becomes as the room spins from my mind spiraling out of control somebody save me from this darkness surfing but no one comes to airlift me from this floor of depression
*Breathe* I can't keep looking up at this ceiling of loneliness for it drips upon me like a poisonous rain every inch of my skin is marked by it while darkness spreads through the sores made by it oh how can I escape this moment all the crumbling and drifting of my emotions please someone save me from this pit of despair then I hear a voice say breathe you're almost there I wake up from my nightmare with a sigh as I felt my heartbeat say breathe you're alive
The alluring serenity that colors the earth's ceiling it graces our hearts with beauty that we can dive in a timeless wonder that we grew up adoring for looking up powered a child's amusement to see the sun basking in the ocean above while looking out at the sea calms our heart's sea
Seeing a butterfly adorn this shade of color summons a smile on our faces at its beautiful decoration for its so rare in nature to see oh how it calms me even when my heart sinks it's my favorite color that my eyes admire soothing and peaceful this much is true as you can expect I'm talking about the color blue
I yet to know the other side of the moon. She only lets me see the best side of her. So one night I asked why can't I see every part of you? She answers with a smirk and said I dance upon your skies with my changes. What more do you need to see when I show you all of my phases. It's enough to keep you guessing so seeing all of me is well a silly question. I smiled at her answer and I knew I would be a fool to keep questioning her. So I once again sat on the shore of loneliness and became content with her presence. So I no longer questioned my view as she glowed brilliantly with her love.
Beauty is upon you like the moon upon the sky shining like moonlight on a dark night your beauty can be seen piercing the dark so look upon me with your desire filled eyes as we hold hands while our hearts talk all night love came upon us like a lost stranger we didn't know it would become a permanent house guest now beauty and love share our bed for you and beauty are as one while love possesses my eyes when I look at you for beauty is upon you like the moon upon the sky yet unlike the moon I can truly call you mine
Memories are like a river they can be harsh or gentle flowing endlessly in the heart and mind never allowing your feelings to be without for they depend on memories to survive like a mighty river our memories provide
Memories rage within different seasons it all depends on the weather's triggers that can bring us back to live within a moment our feelings bathe in their nostalgia yet they can never be back to how they once were for like river it's never the same you'll never be in the same river twice as it flows with new waters we can only watch
Life allows us to experience to visit this riverbed of memories as our feelings are constant visitors to this river we can never destroy this river even if it runs dry it'll eventually be a rainy season all those repressed memories will rush again and we'll be right back on that old riverbank again
Once,when I was young I thought people would stay forever til I realized that obligation belonged to no one so I vowed that in the lives of others I wanted to be there always so I cemented impressions on other's hearts that way nobody would forget me even if we part I'd always be there forever even if the years aged I'd remained unchanged and in perfect condition or so I hoped
the coffee flushed pages of my journal reeks the relics of a medieval castle, the cramming words scribbled in a downpouring hush looks like a bombarded battlefield wincing at the blood-breathing war, a hefty snowstorm flicks out of the ocean liquidated pen when I hold its neck untying the monstrous story buried down inside my chest, thumping indecisively at the autumn dripping sun. they think they can understand but they fail every time to sneak cautiously at it's calloused edges from the corners of my lying eyes.
a superstitious notion is as dangerous as a triggered phobia.
a gratitude refilled heart is as lively as a newly bloomed hibiscus.
a comforting positive self- talk is as surprising as an uninvited robbery.
to thrive empathy and to unleash the magic taming in your heart, include your name while addressing yourself, catch the fireflies exclusively meant for you.
what fires together wires together- don't let your negative way of thinking become an autonomous vehicle of your mind.
* Black tea in our village is consumed with jaggery rather than sugar
* Panta bhaat or Poita bhaat is a meal of cooked rice soaked and fermented in water. Generally leftover, in water overnight. Traditionally served in the morning with salt, onion, chili and mashed potatoes or "Alu Bharta
*Harvest festival here - Bihu
*kotkora - kotkora is a thorny plant bearing fruits. there's a reknown history linked with this tree. Ahom princess Jaymati was tortured while being tied to this tree for 14 days for refusing to betray her husband Gadapani by disclosing his whereabouts.
*THIS POEM WAS MY FIRST PUBLISHED POEM. IT WAS WRITTEN IN DEDICATION TO MY SON DARION JORDAN DELOREY. BORN MAY 30TH, 1996- DIED JANURARY 10TH 1997. THANKS, TO YOU; MY DARLING BOY.. OR I PROBABLY WOULDN'T HAVE STARTED TO PURSUE POETRY AS I HAVE. ALL MY LOVE TO MY ANGEL BABY, MUSE..AS YOU WATCH OVER ME, WHILE I FINISH MY BOOK (AND) FOR GETTING ME THIS FAR.. I MISS YOU EVERYDAY..AND MY HEART IS FOREVER YOURS..❤Mommy
I had tears penning it down for you my Grandpa.. the pain you are suffering today grandpa, I can't see that... You did a lot for others, and you faded yourself amidst completing other's dreams...but I know what you deserved and you will be forever be a PART OF ME. You now don't call me RANI, you are so lost in your pain but trust me your Rani will be forever be your Rani, however grown up I may become. You promised that you will see me becoming a doctor and now please don't break it ... Please be with me I LOVE YOU