jazzy_rampras

I find words and then the emotions:)

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  • jazzy_rampras 29w

    Deepika: Repeat after me

    Depression is a serious issue.
    Depression is not a disease.

    ✓ Acha. Done? More to come?

    (NCB wants to have a coffee with Karan gang)

  • jazzy_rampras 29w

    Dead men tell no tales

    NCB questions half of Bollywood:

    "Why did you procure drugs?"
    "Look at all the WhatsApp chats"

    ✓ Because SSR was a drug addict and
    we all procured drugs to supply his demand

    (Sushant from his grave: WTF!!!)

  • jazzy_rampras 29w

    The most corrupt politician of India

    M. Karunanidhi, TN - Iam the Father of corruption.
    YSR, Andhra Pradesh - I am the Mother of corruption.
    Sonia Maino - I am the Founder of corruption.
    BS Yeddivurappa - I am the Encyclopedia.

    ✓ Sharad pawar - Hold my beer, please.

  • jazzy_rampras 29w

    Thatswhy I never look upto actors

    Sportsmen such as Roger, Sachin, Messi, Rafa
    toil day in and out to reach the pinnacle,
    without compromising the spirit --
    No drugs whatsoever.

    ✓ Here we have actors smashing patriarchy
    by consuming drugs.

    (Some smashing, indeed)

  • jazzy_rampras 29w

    Dhoni dude

    Everyone has left the stadium.
    Match is over.
    What are you still doing out there?

    ✓ TAKING IT DEEP into the last over.

  • jazzy_rampras 29w

    My Pune middle-class Aunty,

    What's your problem if I bring a girl
    into MY flat? I don't sneak through
    your bedroom/ bathroom hole.

    ✓ Its because of people like you Indian culture
    is in ruins. Look at your friend!
    I have never seen him bring any girl
    into flat all these years.

    (My friend is gay, aunty)

  • jazzy_rampras 29w

    You are an adult, no more a boy

    when your mom stops snooping through your bag.

    ✓ You are still a boy, not an adult yet
    when your dad enters your room without knocking.

  • jazzy_rampras 29w

    Now I believe 2020 is a crazy year

    I didn't believe 2020 was the craziest year

    When MSD pulled the plug.
    When SSR's life was snatched away.
    When my Muslim friend rooted for Modi.
    When Djokovic got defaulted.
    When Rafa bit the dust on clay.

    ✓ But when RCB wins its opening match,
    no way 2020 is normal.

  • jazzy_rampras 29w

    Same old story - RCB

    A Kohli/AB fifty.
    An average score btw 150-165 runs.
    Poor opening bowling.
    Chahal contains the middle.
    Abysmal death bowling.

    ✓ Lose by 12-14 runs.

    If batting second, AB/VK carries the show.
    Sometimes they win, most times they lose.

  • jazzy_rampras 29w

    IPL scrapbook

    The team you love the most - CSK
    The team you hate the most - MI
    The team you ignore the most - DD

    ✓ The team you pity the most - RCB