"Please God give me long and silky hairs like Rapunzel" I used to pray this to God everyday in my childhood. I'm sure most of the girls have prayed for long hairs atleast once in their lifetime. And luckily I also got long , straight and silky hairs, Yaa not as good as Rapunzel but I was happy with my hairs. Infact people used to give me compliments on my long and smooth hairs. But we all know, good time doesn't stay for a long. I used to cry and used to shout on the barber if he cuts even one inch extra hairs, but one day I cut offend my all hairs, I shaved my head. Yaa it wasn't a bad dream, it was happening in reality. Due to the disease called psoriasis (one kind of skin disease) I had to do that. My whole life turned into nightmare. Because for me, the real beauty was my long hairs. I not only lost my hairs but also lost my self confidence at that time of my life. I was crying louder and louder after every cut. I was crying louder and louder after every cut. I was sadly watching all my pretty hairs falling on ground. And in just a 15 minutes he cut offed all my hairs, and I became bald. I felt like all my beauty is gone. Now no one will love me, now no one will accept me. That day, whole night I cried alot. Another day at college, as it was new college so I had only 2-3 friends, from them i told my whole situation to one friend and I don't know why she started ignoring me after that day, I don't even know the reason. I wore scarf and I went to college & everyone was like " why r u wearing scarf in hot weather?" I don't had energy to explain them the whole thing so I said "I have fever" then next-day I explained my feelings to another 2-3 frndz and hopefully they are still my good friends. Then some boys of my class started teasing me "dadiji, behenji, etc" bcz of my scarf . I was mentally so disturbed I didn't had energy to fight with them. Days passed, weeks passed, and I got used to with my situation. But still I was disturbed because I never imagined that one day I have to cut off my all hairs. I didn't even clicked any pic for literally like 6 months. Because I was started feeling that I'm looking very ugly. I didn't even like to see my face in the mirror. But this situation taught me who are really connected with me and who all were there only for my beauty. Then after 5-6 months on my college event at Imagica I decided to go there without my scarf, because that day also I wanted to see who can really accept me at my bad, at my worse. So I went college without scarf with my very small hairs. And that day my friends were like" see ur hairs came back, you don't wear scarf from tomorrow" and that day finally after long time I clicked pics with them , and also with other people (new frndz) . And another day some people asked me about my hairs, scarf and all because they seen my pics in long hairs so I told them whole story and they are still with me.
I lost so many opportunities due to lack of confidence because for me my long hairs were my beauty. But then I realized, if you don't accept yourself as it is then no one will. Then I started loving myself again with my small tiny hairs. And now they are grown up little bit more again.
I'm not sharing this because I want everyone' pity and sympathy and all of that. I'm Sharing this because- 1) I just want to tell those 2-3 fake friends that yes "I'm happy" & 2) Just love yourself as the way you are, don't crave for perfection