It gets better. It does.
It's 3 am. I stare right through my ceiling and into the pitch black sky. There's a cascade streaming down my face, moonlight enlightens my eyes and they glitter with love. Love, that was too much for you to handle. I tend to look around but there's nothing but deafening silence. I scream into my pillow to kill the silence, but my voice echoes in the fabrics of pad and dies. Lovers are finally fading after bearing years of pain, Nobody cares anymoreSo why do you? -fajr
Maybe temp. Maybe not.
// LEFTOVERS //There are words i wish i would've said , and people i wish i would've met. On evenings when guilt fills my throat, and i choke on your memories, i wish i could spill all the blood on the book i read last night. There are leftovers of you on my bedsheet, they cut me open like a blade. Come and get them soon. // LULLABIES // The worst part about you is that you don't mean alot of things you tell me, and i close my eyes and listen to your stories like a kid. Then? Then i walk down the memory lane and cry myself to sleep. // SERENE SILENCE // It's so hard to believe when you tell me you love me, because all i have is silence to offer and insecurities ripping me apart. Why would you fall for silence and name it peace. It's wrecking my nerves. // 13 WORLDS APART // I catch myself sitting and thinking about you constantly, i no longer can focus on a single act, the sky looks beautiful for 13 minutes, there are 13 reasons why i lay on bathroom floor bleeding, 13 people that are about to die any moment, 13 stars in a parallel line since 13 years, we used to gaze at when we were 13, but i was replaced within 13 days. -fajr
// It tears me up when you turn me downI'm begging please Just stick around. // -Love is gone.
You held me like you'd hold me forever,And loved me like it'll last till eternity, Little did i know, our love is fading as time passes by, And from "you matter" to "nothing matters anymore" , the journey of love ended in pain. // Two strangers who own each other's heart. // -fajr
Non sense. I feel sad. Okbye. I love rain. Just not right now. Not right now.
Does rain bring melancholy? Or is it you, looking for reasons to shed tears along with clouds? -fajr
My ribs are made of anxiety,and the muscle that bleeds pain,is made of your memories, i lay on my couch, like a dead poem, fighting the urge to cry, When a random 6 am memory hits me, it's you, your voice, deep whispers,and the promises of forever that hurt every single atom i own. -fajr
Is my silence too quiet? Is the pain not prominent enough?
You pass my street everyday, like that old library you used to visit daily, like an open book waiting for you, but you don't stay to read anymore. -fajr
I write bullshit when my heart aches. Yeah stfu. Thanks.
I've mastered the art of silence. my entire life, I've been speaking, screaming, sobbing silently. I've been drifting away from people. I've been leaving places. People i loved hard. Places I built homes in. I've been fading away. In silence. I've been disappearing. In silence. I've been living through my tragedies. In silence. -fajr
On days when I crave your presence, love leaves few bruises, the clouds bleed pain, my veins circulate hurt, few scars kiss my wrist,and my soul is shattered into two separate halfs. One half screams your name, the other half remains silent, slowly creating poetries that are left incomplete. My eyes shed galaxies, since they cannot meet yours. Your love healed me, only to break me all over again. While i sit and question my worth in your life,You dance on my wounds. Leave cuts that are deeper. Scarier. Eternal. Love for me is selflessness,Love for me is hurting for them butstill not returning the bullet wounds. While i fight the urge to break,I sleep through the worst of nightmares, The caution tapes around my heart,Were never decorated to keep you out. The walls that i built around,Were there to protect something That still beats, bleeds, and buries blue memories. -fajr
@writersnetwork Thankyou👀❤️This was so random.
I wiped the last tear, held my brush, tried painting you. But destiny had some other plansI forgot your face. The only thing i could remember was the touch of your soft hands, the taste of your lips, the warmth you brought with that one embrace, how do i portray all this. How do i manage to lock my love for you in this empty white canvas. I angrily threw all the colors on the canvas, tried decorating them with my clumsy hands. Colours like blue. Grey. White. Black. It looks nothing like you, but the abstract art is all about feels. The random colours feel exactly like your heartwarming presence and your heartwrenching absence. I've lost the privilege to touch you. feel you. love you. So i cover the distances from my soul to your soul through words and colours. I hide you in my poetries and lock you in my messy canvases. You left ages ago, but I'm making you stay on my own way. -fajr
There are nights when I so want to talk to you. But i know, you must be setting yourself on fire to stop the fight between your parents. Or sitting on the roof, looking at the dark cloudless sky, and injecting that deadly poison in your veins, that temporarily gives you peace. Or you must be with some girl, who's in love with you, but you are probably just playing around, using her body to shush your demons; feeling guilty, for you are going to leave her alone on the stained sheets next morning, or it might be one of those good days for you, where you play with your favorite niece, who treats you like an ideal, or you are just sitting there with your ex, telling her to heal you, for you've broken her beyond repair, and hearing " I've forgiven you " somehow breaks you a little more. It's been so long since we've sung our favorite song together. It's been so long, since I've played that song, and i cannot dare to, it hurts. Playing our song, without you completing the lyrics with me, hurts. //Dard dilun k km hojate, Mein aur tum agar hum ho jaate//. Mein aur tum agar hum ho jaate. Mein aur tum agar hum ho jaate. -fajr
#19thoughts I imagine would have crossed Ishida's (Koe no Katachi) mind, while standing on the bridge, deciding whether to end it all or not.#character
can we be friends?
“back then, if we could have heard each other’s voices...”it's been a while since I last saw you;in all honesty,everything is going south sinceI last saw you,but a scum that I am,I won't complain— I don't deserve to;I've planned to cut the threadof my disgraceful being for a while now;the river of guilt flows beneath me,but the scum that I am,I am afraid to take the leap,and the horrible crook I am,I blame it on you.do you still remember when youstood infront of me,made signs in a language I didn't know,and I threw sand at your face;I have learnt it now—the whole sign language throughand through and I understand that you brought your palms together asking meto be your friend;it doesn't matter now,does it?but still, on sleepless nights,I regret what I did to you,and I regret being rude to you,but the scum I am,I speculate often what yourreaction would be if I proposedto be your friend right now,would you shake hands with me—a person who bullied you,and always madeyou feel like an outsider?the hearing aids I pulled outfrom your ears and blood drippeddown to your chin;did it hurt a lot?will I ever be able to compensatefor the pain I've given you,and the smiles you've given in return, will I ever?it's a curse probably,that I am scared to look at the facesof people and my only desire and escape is to cover my ears tight, extremely,or maybe a frail attempt to feel howyou might have felt back then;I mocked you for not being able to listen,and now I don't want to hear anything or anyone,but the scum I am,if only I could hear your words of forgiveness—what'd I do for them,I'd die for you to forgive me,but what do I do toforgive myself?I stacked up the money from my part-time jobs under mom's pillow,and I'm away from home,standing on this bridge,at the edge of the end of this abomination;I can't live anymore,I don't deserve to;Nishimiya, I always thought you were the dumb and deaf one but it was always me;me, who couldn't understand you even when you opened your heart to me;me, the dumbest one,who was too scared to tell you what I hid inside my chest;you, who never heard myvoice because you couldn't,and me, a coward;the weight on my heart isimmeasurable,and I don't deserve to bearound anymore;I can't see and hear people incorridors because I feel they're talking about me—there goes Ishida, the absolute worst who bullieda girl in middle school.do you remember the notebookyou used for communication?I still have it, I flip the pages,and wail for my inabilityto turn back the time;I was supposed to die today,but the scum that I am,I have one more selfish wish,to see you once,I want to make you happy,I want to love you,I want to hear your voice.“...everything would have been so much better.”©zohiii
What the hell? @wn #mayatbay #mdc #writersbay#oof£ #ceesrepostsRIP to the first two lines.
The world is high on bleeding, I'm high on chilling. Watching them burn, Maybe next is your turn. She must be a sorceressFeelings filtered and compressed, I am a ghost, Not a host. My body was a cage, And I was performing on a stage. ©anush18
May 29th, 12:29 AMI am thinking and I like it. Still a guy stuck in the oral traditions. To be understood is a relief but I don't write to get some eyes moored at my perceptions. Don't know which part of content and operations gave this product. I don't provide any sort of description for my poems because I don't like people knowing what exactly I want to convey, on the top of that, it's always better to read a poem and make it yours. Been thinking, and it's not new.
Onto a crack
On the Broadway, in the midst of beautiful buttcracks one's my favouritethe one I haven't touched yet it's the one that's far away behind bushes and a lattice under a well woven mattress. It has got zits on its cheeks and it shrinks when it sitsSmells like a flower when in love A long lasting snuff.©nightwriter_i
Hey beautiful people, Read previous chapters before proceeding to this one. Tag everyone you know. Look for errors. Send me pizza. Tag me in your stories. Tell me gossips. Add me on Instagram. Enjoy. Thank you#AndSoLoveHappened'Smile'
And So Love Happened!
CHAPTER - 08Vansh couldn't sleep last night and missed his first two lectures as he got up late that day. He went straight to the class. Hasija ma'am was giving a lecture on Regional planning. He took a peek inside of the classroom to check if Pulkit was there. He called him to know his whereabouts when he couldn't find him in the class. "Come in the library and bring a map of Haryana," Pulkit whispered. Pulkit was sitting in a corner of the library with several A3 sheets scattered all over the table, occupying at least four seats. "What the hell are you doing here?" Vansh asked taking the seat in front of Pulkit. "Making my project file as you can see.""But why? Last I checked the due date was next week.""Yeah... that's kinda the whole point here." "Forget about it. Why didn't you wake me up in the morning?" "Excuse me?" Pulkit squinted his eyes, "I did and almost missed the first lecture because of you. What were you on last night?""I couldn't sleep last night.""Oh, c'mon man! Don't tell me you were stressing about Dhwani's reply.""I wasn't.""But your face is telling a different story. What happened with you two?""I don't know, man!" Vansh said aloud without realizing they were in the library. The librarian shushed glaring at him. "Let's get out of here," Pulkit said collecting his sheets. "Where are we going?" "Let's find out in what medium sound waves are travelling today," said Pulkit pulling Vansh's hand as they walked down the stairs. "Shut up!" said Vansh smirking. They searched every corner of the college to find Dhwani and at last found her sitting under the Pipal tree near the canteen, at the same spot where Vansh and her used to eat every day. She was sipping on a juice cane. Pulkit gestured for Vansh to go and talk to her. "Eating alone, heh?" Vansh asked sitting down on a chair in front of her. "No, just having a juice," Dhwani clipped. "Are you okay?" Dhwani nodded taking a sip of her juice. "Are you mad at me?" "Do I have a reason to?" She asked in the same tone. "What happened? Would you tell me please?" Vansh snapped. "Why are you asking me? Ask your friends!" Dhwani raised her voice. "My friends?" Confused, he asked, "What did they do?""You don't know? Yeah, why would you? You never seem to notice any of their mistakes.""Dhwani," subduing his voice, "I am sorry but tell me exactly what happened?" Vansh asked."You don't remember? You don't remember the double meaning comments your friends passed at me yesterday?""Which one....""And it's not the first time they have said something like that. One of your asshole friends was calling me bhabhi the other day." Dhwani said cutting him in between."Hey don't call my friend an asshole," said Vansh without realizing his finger pointing at her."Asshole is not the point, Vansh. You never acknowledge your friends' mistakes and that's not cool.""I am sorry," said Vansh taking Dhwani's hand in his. "No, you are not sorry," she said jerking away from his hand. "You don't understand, Vansh. I am not your girlfriend...""I know.""... and I feel uncomfortable when your friends treat me like that. I am okay to take a little joke once in a while but this nonsense hooting and double meaning comment every time we are together is simply not cool.""I am sorry, Dhwani. I had no idea how you felt. I'll talk to them.""And make me look like a bitch in front of them? No, thank you." "Don't be unreasonable, Dhwani. Give them a chance. They are not bad people. I am sure their intention was not to hurt you." "Always... always taking your friends' side. Huh, Vansh?" she said hopelessly. Vansh was quiet. "I am getting late for the class now," she said and stormed off. Vansh couldn't even try to stop her. He just watched Dhwani go away freezing on his chair without blinking his eyes.©dewanshk
#12"कर दे मुझे मुझसे ही रिहा।" — कुन फया कुन
falling down, rising up?
I stand in my balcony,trapped in these walls of concrete and in this vessel of flesh, and blood;the street lights seementicing and inviting;what'd I do for a recklessrun under their flickering lights;it's one of those nights,when I am left withsuperficial questions,and searching for answers,is undoing of a knotthat's fated to entanglemore everytime I tryto set it loose;I stand in my balcony,trapped by more than whatmeets the eye;confined in and inside mythoughts and your thoughts, in your desire to heal me,in your inability to comprehend my pain,in my failure to trust you,in your constant cries to make me stay,in my persistent repulsionto hearing you out,in your expression of love,and in my undying war that you don't understand love,and you love, out of fear,that you don't understand it,in my constant struggleto love you back the same,in your endless wordsthat tell me it'll be okay,and sometimes,rarely, sometimes,I almost believe you;I stand in my balcony,and the ground is miles away,if I took a free fall now,will I grow wings, grey?©zohiii
Hey beautiful people, You know the drill. Read the previous chapters first. Tag everyone you know. Look for errors. Enjoy. Also, it's @fairytales_ 's birthday today. Happy Birthday. May you get all the happiness in the word and make everyone deprived of it.#AndSoLoveHappened'Smile'
CHAPTER - 07It had been a month since Vansh and Dhwani started talking and they were inseparable ever since. They were together all the time and when they were not, they were either on a call or texting each other. Vansh's friends had started teasing him with Dhwani's name and he was relishing all the attention.One afternoon, Vansh and the group decided to play dodgeball with a light plastic ball, they had found in the playground, in front of their class when they had a free period. The boys from one of the most prestigious educational institutions of the country were showcasing their class by howling and horsing around in the corridor. Aditya threw the ball to hit Pulkit, but he ducked and the ball went bouncing towards Vansh. In an attempt of catching the ball, Vansh lost his balance and merely escaped falling over Dhwani and her friends, when they were getting out of their class. Everyone started hooting loudly when Dhwani swiftly grabbed Vansh by his shoulders with her lightning reflexes. "Thank you," Vansh said hiding his embarrassment. "Hey Pulkit, do you wanna hear a scientific fact?" Aditya said screaming from a corner. "Always up for it bro," Pulkit replied in the same tone. "Do you know 'sound waves' travel the fastest in a solid medium?" "Woah! And you know what's solid?" "Our brother Vansh!" Aditya said and everyone cracked up hard. The whole corridor erupted with the hoots of laughter and everyone scattered away at once when all the hullabaloo forced a teacher, teaching in a nearby class, to come there to check what the matter was.In the evening that day, Pulkit came to Vansh's room. "What are you doing, man? It's your turn to cook." He said. Vansh stayed as he was, constantly staring at his phone, completely unbothered by Pulkit as if he wasn't there. "May I ask the reason of this sullen face?" Pulkit asked sitting beside Vansh on his 6×4 mattress. "Dhwani left college early today. She didn't even meet me before leaving. She never does that. I always walk her to the bus stop. She hasn't even seen my text yet." Vansh told him. "Something must have come up. Don't dig too much about it. C'mon! Let's order something and watch a good movie today. Okay?" Pulkit said cheering him up. Vansh nodded. The lights were off but empty pizza boxes could be seen in the light of the laptop. There was a half-drunk bottle of Pepsi lying between Vansh and Pulkit and they chose to watch 'Lord of the Rings' that day. It was their favourite movie of all time and Pulkit thought watching the brilliant cinema would help Vansh lighten up his mood. Vansh, however, had no interest in watching and was continuously using his phone to check whether Dhwani had texted him or not. "You are a lost cause, brother," Pulkit said getting up. "What?" Asked Vansh looking up at him. "You are in love," he said gently patting on Vansh's head and went back to his room. Vansh closed the laptop lid without shutting it down and put it over the empty pizza boxes. He lay down covering his face with a sheet and tried to sleep taking no notice of the anxiety kicking in. A few minutes after lying down quietly, he checked his phone again when he couldn't sleep. He was disheartened to see his empty inbox even after there were blue ticks on his last text. "I am in love," he murmured and put the phone away slowly breathing out.©dewanshk
Word of the day: UnfoldTag and share with #unfoldc
Okay, so you inspired me a lot to write this ♡❀@shrey2310 I'll miss you @frankly_moloch Keep shining✨@writersnetwork #mayatbay #ceesreposts@lovenotes_from_carolynok. now. go. Walking corpse synodrome: you'll feel like your body parts are missing but it's not the matter.
Dear Diary, This is for no one but you, all of this I'm gonna spill here. The biggest fears of my life are my bonds with people, I'm afraid to know that they believe on my lies more than my reality. My lies? Lies of being fine, lies of smiles I fake, lies of happiness. Questions have their ends as answers, what is the end of happiness? They give birth to another set of sadness for being all caught up in this mess again. Sometimes I feel bad for misery, I lend them somedays to breathe, and then happiness comes, the worst part with happiness is that it is fake. The best thing with this feeling of dejection is that it's easy to carry because I've been exposed to it for a very long time and now it's good to carry this on my shoulders as they are my responsibilities. They ask me to be the same and never change, I should tell them that everything is toneless and dynamic in its own way but they don't believe, they believe on lies, because it's hard to live with the truth. Today, it has been six days since I have smiled a smile full of life, I loved being alive but now being more than anything what matters to me is suffering from walking corpse syndrome. I know that this feels weird but I can't run from the reality.Everyone gets knocked down sometimes, but you always go deeper and deeper. And one day I'll have to dive deep in the bottoms of the faded sea to get your soul outta here. Every person has his own modus operandi of dying, I died becoming words for my feelings. Now, I'm just a ghost roaming around. Someone long ago, said to me, of course that "someone" was very close to me (was hurts) and that someone said " , , " I didn't have an answer at that time, but now I do have one. I didn't know if it was normal for others to see a corpse walkin with no feelings, only some stupid questions in head. I didn't want them to leave and break me in zillion pieces and laugh at my abnormalities, therefore, I left loving them before they left. I am still afraid, I am a fickle minded person, I'm more of a sunset person, I'm more of an empty person. And here, My head has started collapsing and now It's the only closest thing I could still get to feel recovered.©anush18
#WritingContest Participate in writing contests hosted in the Creative Arena.
...you need to attend to those scars. Treat them gently and let them heal. If you don't let them heal my love, they will keep holding you back and prevent you from running forward. But once they heal, you can run to the end of the world.As you run forward my dear, remember to let go of those despicable memories. Don't let them keep you down.I know you are hurting and in pain, so that's why you chose to run. But my love, running won't solve it all. Sit down in solitude for a moment and reminisce the past, I don't mean the past that hurt you, I mean those idyllic moments in the past.The past that made you smile and laugh, the past that you cherish with your heart. Don't lock yourself up in those daunting memories. Let the serendipity that comes with those good memories engulf your heart. Don't let the past that does not deserve you, haunt you. You are better than that. So chin up, be brave and face your fears. Fight them till they give up and fight till your last breath.~Hkarage