I remember you said that , but I had a different opinion. Maybe I can be a river because I am not still, but you are a river, even when you are not flowing. We are meant to be on the opposites. I am walking in a haze, haze of false notions. We were the same river, flowing in the opposite directions. I promised not to write you goodbye poem or tear-jerking proses, not even a single line I might keep forever buried deep inside my heart but I couldn't stop. I was hallucinating, about us. I didn't realise when did this US ended up in YOU & ME, but it's okay. I can't run away from this fact that I always write your name on the bark of the oak tree under which we used to weave our uninterrupted world but then all the threads tangled, and you escaped from the tangled threads but woefully, I got stuck there, and with your memories, heart heavy, lips chapped, eyes swollen, ears deaf...
I promised that I would just let you go, that you would not hear me asking why, but I keep chanting those questions as if they are my prayers and you're my god. God? I never believed on god but the time when you were in the hospital, I prayed, I prayed for you, that was the least I could do. I don't blame gods for my doomed fate, but I don't blame myself either.
I promised that I would never write for someone's leaving again, but the metaphors felt like blades over my skin. One day I'll see this world in a different way, when I will not have this guilt of losing someone to whom I shared every grey painting etched on my heart but ironically, the grey hues are not as hurting as your memories embedded in the membranes alive. They ask me if I am okay in the threads but no one dared to take me out of that world, but, now, I have given up.
shrey2310@anush18 ah, hah That's too much for me, I'm good being just another writer :")
shrey2310Heh sending n deleting msgs, huh? Hehe, I'm fine, i read that msg. Tbh I'm in writer's block maybe. Don't worry I'll write soon. Also hey, you don't have someone to tell you "Write" cuz you're not a good writers? Never say that, not to anyone, not to yourself too. No one can decide who is a good or bad writer. It's just that, writing is something that requires time, just wait I'm sure you'll be a great writer :") Dw, next time se mai hi WRITE WRITE ka spam kar dunga
anush18@shrey2310 i thought you won't reply. And there was something that was irritating me so i ended up deleting. Yes, that's it. It's writers block and it's common.
Yes, there are so many reasons to agree on this fact. Yeah, I don't say it on a regular basis but you know I somehow know that I ain't a good one and I don't wanna be.
I don't want to advertise my feelings for pods, it's good to have such a lovely audience but the ones which are raw and straight from my heart, I think no one should read it and they end up being in my drafts or sometimes I delete them.
Thank you so much for your words. But you know what I write is nothing but just an expression of my complex feelings which I rarely tell anyone else. (Additionally, it's shit )
You're so sweet and funny :∆
shrey2310@anush18 tbh i get that, you're not in the phase i guess. I used to save my raw writeups in drafts too, even now i do but then i thought okay let's try some proses and ntng helped me more than penning raw emotions to me, so i thought okay let's post. However it's all personal opinion, some may like it, some may not.