As you start to become authentic and let yourself be free, it's like a light starts to shine out of you everywhere you go.
Most people have been hiding in the dark caves of their limited self-images for decades, so when they're suddenly exposed to the light of your authenticity + freedom, it's like a flashlight shining in their eyes; they'll immediately want to dim your light.
Because your light exposes their conditioning. It exposes that they've been hiding their true self for decades, and it forces them to see themselves, which is very uncomfortable. So your presence will subconsciously make them feel insecure.
Depending on the person, they will either be inspired by your light, look at who they really are and come out into their own light. Or they will have to dismiss your energy mentally. And the easiest way to dismiss someone is to paint a negative picture of them in your mind.
So they'll perceive you as a "show off" or assume that you're trying hard to stand out, because they have no other way of making sense of your freedom. Of course they won't say this. You'll notice it in a subtle snicker or subtle joke when you dance, sing, or express yourself in a way that makes them uncomfortable.
In a subtle way that hides their insecurity, they'll try to undermine you. To pull you back down to their level as if to say "You're not better than me so stop acting like it."
Most people will quickly 'dim their light' to make these people feel more comfortable around them. But as Marianne Williamson said, 'Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.'
Any time you go through a storm, when it seems everything is going wrong, and your life is in chaos and your future is doomed, there is a simple yet profound recognition that frees you from this suffering.
And that is to recognize that the chaos only exists because you are continuously projecting it in your mind. Worrying/stressing about the future can only exist in the form of thinking.
Don't let your mind sabotage your peace in this moment by thinking about some imagined future. The storm is mainly this imagination. Simply stop feeding your thinking/worrying and snap your attention back to this moment right here right now. this endless Now is always the eye of the storm, and it is the only reality.
When you return your attention back to reality, you realize you're just chilling on your chair/bed, completely peaceful in this moment with no real threats to you whatsoever, other than the threats of your own thoughts about the future.
I can hear you say, "but I have real physical problems with real consequences that will come up, and they're terrible... "
Yes I understand. There is some level of planning that is required ahead of time for some situations (a lot less than we imagine, but still). If you need to plan, then take a few minutes to plan. Do what is in your control and then LEAVE IT.
Whatever happens will happen. Most of the time we spend the entire week worrying and freaking out about what will happen and trying to plan every little thing we'll do, and then when the time actually comes, something unexpected happens and everything just works itself out, one way or another.
Maybe if you learned to be present and to flow with life instead of trying to force your projections onto life, you would start to see the opportunities that present themselves in each moment. Ironically, you would handle the situation better if you simply stay present rather than spending the entire week worrying about it.
When you let go of trying to control how things go, you will start to see that life takes care of life. You will trust Life once again, like when you were a pure child. Then you'll see the peace and blessings that were here all along.
The second you say, "I've left the old me. Now I've found my true self" is the second you start believing in a new self-image. In other words, it's the second you start a new cycle of deceiving yourself.
We go on defining and redefining ourselves our entire life. putting on mask after mask. not realizing who/what exactly is trying on all these masks. not realizing who/what is playing these roles in this play of life.
Think about who you were 10 years ago. Really think back and picture the person you thought you were back then.
Now think back 5 years ago. When you laughed embarrassingly at the 'you' from 10 years ago. If I had asked you 5 years ago "who are you?" you would've said "I have grown a lot, and now I've found myself".
But look at how much you've changed now from 5 years ago. If I asked you now, you would say the same thing. That you were young and a bit foolish 5 years ago but now you've found yourself and that this is the real you.
The wise realize that self-images change, beliefs change, and personalities change--and so they drop these concepts completely. If you truly see this, if you know this, you will realize that what you are cannot possibly be defined by a personality.
There is no "real you" that you unlock when you improve yourself to the right degree of confidence, skills and personality traits. So I'll save you a lifetime of searching for, and trying to become this perfect self. It doesn't exist.
So then what is the truth of who/what you are? If not a personality, then what exactly are you? This becomes obvious as you empty yourself. Empty of any self-image, empty of beliefs, empty mind in each moment.
Be empty and observe, with this question silently in your heart, as you move thru each moment of life. If your search is true, you will find true inner peace.
Why is it that inspiration always comes at the most random times?
Like when you're sprinting 'cause you're hella late, or when you're hands are full of dish soap and you're scrubbing away...
I feel like it's a game the universe plays with you. Like yo, imma throw some incredible inspiration/creativity at you, but at the most random times. And you're gonna have about one second to capture it in some way before its gone, forever.
Oh and it's not just one thing, it's a wave that comes. Like a live speech that has already started, and I gotta bust out a typewriter to keep up with typing the words, while listening to the speech as it's happening.
That's pretty much how every poem/verse of mine happens. Or at least that's how it starts. Once I write down a chunk of it, sometimes I'll go back and be inspired to add more to it. That's exactly what happened with this little verse.
Never thought I'd quote lil Wayne in my poetry posts but here's some deep bars from the man: "Life is such a f*ckin' rollercoaster, then it drops. But what should I scream for? This is my theme park. My mind shines even when my thoughts seem dark."
There's going to be ups and downs in life but don't get too caught up in them. Let this temporary journey of life be what it is without trying so hard to control it all the time. When you trust Life and start to simply observe with a quiet + empty mind, you'll start to notice the peace and blessings that were here all along.
You simply had your attention elsewhere so you couldn't see. You were too focused on talking to your mind about every little up and down in your life. Too busy trying to mitigate risks, analyzing, predicting, complaining, wanting more, etc. Too busy in your mind to see the peace and blessings that have always been right here with you.
Life is passing by. Are you living in it? Or are you constantly living in the movie playing in your head?
This movie world (aka the world of thinking) is blinding you from living in reality, like you're living in your own hidden bubble within the real world. If you've ever practised listening to the voice in your head, you quickly notice that it never shuts up. ever.
So what is it exactly that's constantly keeping you in this movie world, this world of thinking? The secret cord that attaches you to it is: the main character of this movie.
In each moment you are absorbed in either thinking about this character's upcoming future or ruminating about this character's past. Your whole life, you have been playing the main character of this movie that's constantly being projected in your mind. Your whole life you have assumed this character is you.
But how can you be this character/voice in your head if you can observe it? Who are you who is observing this character speaking in your head, telling stories to you?
This you have to find out for yourself, repeatedly inquiring every time you catch yourself in the world of thinking.
Who is the one telling the story and who is the one listening to/watching it?
Of course we have some limited choice. For example you can choose to read the rest of this caption or to just keep scrolling. But in the bigger picture, we don't really have control over other people or what happens in our life. If we did, then our lives would be "perfect" and we would only ever experience love and positivity. But obviously this is not the case since we are constantly experiencing things that are painful/undesirable etc. Because we don't control life. Matter of fact, we don't even have control over our own thoughts. Do you get to control what you're going to think about throughout your day? No, thoughts just randomly pop into your head.
Those who observe closely, will see that Life takes care of life. An incredible inner peace comes from this. I wish this peace upon you.