#suicidalthoughts

178 posts
  • rahoof 2d

    They force me out of my shell when I am not comfortable
    They kick me in to one when I am occasionally confident.
    I know there are a lot of crustacean people out there this poem is for them.����
    .
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    #ptsd #socialanxiety #anxiety #depression #racingthoughts #suicidal #suicidalthoughts #failure #success #friends #family #mentalhealth #peaceofmind #fearoffailure #breakup #relationships #love #longing #moveon #movingon #ex #her #him #introvert #fakepeople #judgementalpeople #toxicfamily #raufpoems #raufpoetry #crustaceanpeople @writersnetwork @miraquill

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    Crustacean people
    ..............................


    Crab man! - crab man! - Crab man!
    They yelled at me on my sister's wedding
    They yelled at me, for they saw me wearing
    A shell over my insecure skin

    They ask me not to hide from my kin
    Must remain comfortable in a family gathering
    surprise not in case we bring a scale
    dont be nervous, fail freely young man!

    Imagine what faces they make
    and how they weigh things with their eyes
    Cant help it When the scale Start tilting
    More and more over to the other side

    Yes, this is the life of a crab man
    who had grown keratin shells for his skin.
    Ask if he's tired of living with people
    who weighs shells with their own judgemental skin

    But just at the end of every occasion
    I grow a shell, thicker than the last one
    Just like a crab changing it's shell
    I prepare myself - for another season


    ©rahoof

  • rahoof 1w

    My euphoria of pain
    ...................................


    Of the many pain I have to go through everyday
    The one that I enjoy the most are the ones about her.
    You would ask, how does one pick favourites
    from their sufferings?
    But there is no other answers to that
    other than-
    "I have to go through this everyday."
    Even if I dont want to-
    My mind is packed with toxins for depression,
    And it decides to screw me often with general anxiety.

    Of the many pain I suffer, I like the most when I suffer thinking about her,
    It was always a kind of an euphoric sweet sensation of pain, acceptance and longing.
    One of the most enjoyable pain that I had ever felt.
    Closed chapter or a broken bridge you can call it whatever,
    you may ask for me to move on and spend more time with my family.
    To that I say,
    of the many few who gets me for who I am,
    family is not among them.

    They might ask,
    why are you being so hard on yourself, you have a roof over your head, you have food to eat, you have all your limbs and is not paralysed from the waist down like the most unfortunate.

    Yes, I am grateful for what I have
    But sometimes I crave for something more
    Than limbs more than food more than a house,
    When I crave for peace of mind.
    I think the most unfortunate people are the ones who fail to find peace for themselves.

    My first experience of anxiety was horrific.
    I even struggled to swallow food and water,
    And I got so fed up with my fear of failure,
    Even with all my limbs I had doubted every step I took with them.
    You can be the richest person of the planet and still end up being worthless
    If you cant find peace of mind.
    That's why people often say that money can't buy happiness
    For me, money is essential but its existence was always sceptical,
    It is funny how money often buys friends but not their loyalty,
    Wonder how it makes your father say that he is only proud If you find out a way
    to successfully make it by yourself.
    This often raises a series of questions that scrambles one's mind
    Wasn't he proud of me anyway?
    Wasn't he proud of being a father to a son that he gave life to?
    Why do you always have to be valued off of your success rather than your attempts to get there?

    The neglect, the isolation, abandonment
    Coupled with misfortune really test your will to live,
    Testing your will, for a reason not to take that final desicion.
    people often nearly end up deciding to tie a noose or to take a cold blade to their vein,
    Or an overdose of pills that doze you off to a never ending sleep,
    Or even wishing for a cardiac arrest on their deepest sleep for a painless death.
    All for proving a point,
    To make you people realise that the pain that they brag about everyday were true all along.
    Dont turn down a person even more if they are already feeling low, lonely or depressed.
    Sadly people end up feeling guilty only after the lose of a life.
    Technically this is not murder,
    but from the perspective of the people who end up committing suicide,
    Their experience of last days could never end up being more sorrowful than those lives inside Nazi concentration camps.
    So people should be held accountable for pushing them to that extreme.

    And from a person who suffers from the pain of uncontrollable racing thoughts,
    Who is struggling to even focus on the littlest things,
    who you blame their head is not at all there,

    Of the many things he suffer each day
    The best was always the ones about her.

    ©rahoof

  • sophrosyne 6w

    What would you do with a time machine?

    Many would travel in time, for they seek excitement, in the past or future, anywhere is far better, anything is fine, as long as they're distracted

    Others wish to leave time, so they could cease to exist, for they wish no future and their past is too cold. Going behind is not an escape and jumping ahead, even to warmth, can't melt them, for nothing can

    and then there are the lucky few...

    who wish to freeze time forever, for they found something so remarkable, right here in the present...

    ©sophrosyne

  • ahuralilith 14w

    Suicidal thoughts.

    A regular unwelcomed guest of mine -
    I don't know what pronoun am i supposed to use - let's use "it" -

    It came at the balcony of my mind last week -
    It lingered around, walking ,did nothing except observed me -
    I could sense it's cold eyes burried inside my soul -

    The day before yesterday -
    It entered inside of me -
    Poisoning every drop of blood in me -

    Insomnia annexed my sleep -
    And it's dark spirit controls me and my mind -
    The four wall of my room are echoed by its cacophony -

    I delve myself out of those four walls -
    I stare at the moon -
    The moon. Well! She didn't look peaceful to me that day -
    How can a mind full of cacophony feel the peace of moon?? I say to myself -
    And for a moment the fact that i was to kill myself vanished -

    But it is not someone who leaves you so soon -
    It came back with extra force -
    It tells - "The moon is peaceful and beautiful but your jealous eyes cant see that."
    It tells ,i don't deserve to live -

    I wanna - LIVE -
    I tell to myself - "you have to live " -
    I lived -

    ©pappu_shin

  • ahuralilith 16w

    I don't wanna die.

    I just don't want to exist -
    Constantly checking social media -
    Hoping i would get something to talk about and not think -
    What am i thinking?? - Take that razor blade and cut yourself -
    Little voice inside of me still wants to achieve her dreams -
    She still wants to smile -
    She - she still wants to live -
    Demons are all i have - and they are all i know -

    What am i crying for??
    It's been days - it's not normal - well is it??
    Am i a psycho??
    Or maybe i am afraid if the - so - called - fucking - humans, might think i'm one -
    My less than small eyes are swollen -
    And my nails are buried inside my skin -
    I do not bleed -
    I just enjoy the pain -
    Or maybe it's a rehearsal for - "how to enjoy the pain " -

    What am i thinking??
    I mean there should be something -
    I'm fucking tired of surviving -
    Surviving is "life" for me -
    I'm tired of living -
    And want to try a new place -
    Maybe hell?? - i know nothing -

    Well -
    Will death approach me -
    Or -
    Do i need to approach death -

    ©pappu_shin

  • _shattered_soul 19w

    In the eye..

    Do you know how it feels?

    Do you care how it feels? To be forced into living

    In the eye of a storm

    Each day?

    Being pushed from all sides,

    Being pulled from all sides

    A different storm each day

    Tosses me into spins

    Of confusion.

    One day from one side I hear,

    The next day from the other side I hear,

    And don't forget, the third side,

    Ever present, yet never there, has the

    Biggest voice of all.

    Somehow forgotten in the game,

    Somehow ignored within the game,

    Yet always secretly playing,

    Quietly whispering why

    I can't play.

    Today it may be one of you.

    Tomorrow? It may be none of you.

    Confused, untrusting, and very alone I sit,

    Everyday in the eye of your storms.

    No wonder it’s called the

    “Death Zone".

    Image Source : Google


    #LostLife #SuicidalThoughts #Pain #ShatteredSoul

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    ©_shattered_soul

  • microcosm 22w

    Picture Me Rollin' _!!!

    Suicidal slitting, they said loathingly,
    blood-driven, stampings of interlude,
    perdition strangling up, the integrity,
    levelling the legacy, wrapped to perish,
    word is bond, i took over the sunlight,
    this dauntless dilemma of numbness,
    demise, my dreams of working mind,
    nowhere, the fate foretelled the soul,
    only anger left now, no rebuttals off,
    fiending over the dying breed, vulture,
    argued once, that look over your side,
    my highest moments of divinity, hah,
    they killed me knowingly, the rhyme,
    and reasons of fundamental defiance,
    the share of my fall, the taking of jokes,
    untouched, these words from my pen,
    suited up all black, funeral of barbers,
    so, fuck me and this, the suicidal shite,
    god blessed me, the devil got berating,
    the hail mary, ultraviolet ghost of mercy,
    may he be placed among the righteous,
    ohh, i will, i will, we ain't going nowhere,
    the sweetest morsel, revenge they said,
    behold, this that solo makaveli dream,
    to hell with the world, against all odds.

    ©off_tsi9g

    #damned #offseason #falloffate #mirakeewrites #simba #amari #suicidalthoughts #makavelithedon
    #westside #solo

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    People rarely bring flowers to a suicide.

    - Jennifer Niven.

  • full_auto 26w

    I'm in pain and lost

    •its driving me insane and that's the cost
    I swear I'm gonna lose my mind
    • If someone else I know commits suicide
    • It seems I've cried out my eyes cuz I'm blind
    • Blind to the reason why my friends and family wanna hide when they have feelings of wanting to take their lives
    • When the stress is too high and they'd rather die
    • Why cant I provide help to the ones in my life
    • Why isnt their pain easier to see in my eye sight/
    • It's all wrong nothing seems right everything is fallen apart around me
    •  I stay up at night sometimes ballin
    • because the worlds gettin lonely
    • With everyone thats fallin
    •  it's another one that wont ever call me
    • Another voice I'll never hear another face ill never see
    • Another name less will speak
    •  another one I cant reach out too when I'm needing someone who'll help me
    • Another dream woke me up cuz I wanted to scream and in the dream
    • it seems I'm on the ground and i call out to you cuz I cant move as I look around
    •  but your no where to be found my mouth moves but nothing's comin out
    • and I miss the sound that your voice makes
    •  I miss  seeing your face no one can fill your place
    I just wish you could help me understand why you had to leave me 
    • When the world's causin pain and its gettin to me and I just need someone to listen and tell me to breath
    • Say That everything is going to be alright and not to give up the fight


    • I thought that's what I could do for you but I guess everything's going to be ok isnt always true
    • I started writing a list of those I lost and it got so long
    • I had to flip the page and start at the top this is so wrong
    • But this is life so in a way I guess it's right
    • It's just sooner than anyone had in sight
    • When they imagined the life you had and where it would end
    • Come to think about it did we ever really imagine our friends
    • And family's lives come to an end
    • No not even for a second did I ever prepare for this
    • Because I always thought of myself as weak and less
    • Likely to be strong enough for what mess life sends to test
    • Our mental best and hits our chest with shit like this I confess
    • I need help at times and when I do I find a way to deal with mine
    • Before I go and hurt myself its crazy life really ain't that funny
    • But we find ways to laugh and get threw except for a few
    • I never knew would break and choose to
    • Take a weak approach at being through
    • With what life has to offer
    • Never did I think for a second I'd grow from a son and brother into a father have a son of my own and two daughters
    • And if you told me that out of these who made this choice to be weak and me that I'd be the one stronger
    • I would of laughed in your face and thought you needed a doctor
    • It's crazy how life works and and the directions it turns
    • But that's life and its somethin we all must learn
    • No matter how you perceive it the message is all the same
    • And we gotta remember some choices have consequences that remain
    • In a way that cant ever be changed
    • Cuz once you make that decision to end your pain
    • The ones left behind are the ones you really hurt and get burnt by your flame
    • And that I can say from experience I wish I never had burns forever in us man
    • So before you take that leap please lemme ask
    •  what did I do to you for you to put me threw that crap
    • Never think for a second you've disappointed me believe
    • unless suicide is the way you decided to leave
    • I'm getting so sick of crying as I'm saying goodbye
    •  to friends my age more successful then me no lie
    • who decided a selfish way to die
    • So one more time and im gonna lose my mind
    • Help me by choosing life
    ©combeau

  • _eridamilare 32w

    ANATOMY

    "sorry for your loss,
    such a death!
    was he I'll before he passed"?
    That's it,yes that's it,
    The only thing they'll say,
    The only thing falling on the ears of your family back-to-back,
    So you,stupid you,
    Don't jump off that bridge,
    If you need to isolate,do it
    Don't drink that poison bottle,
    There's enough water to go round,
    Keep pushing,don't relent
    Keep your inner thoughts where they belong,
    Check yourself!
    Know your priorities,
    Lastly, loss is as good as surplus
    Because it will eventually end.
    ©_eridamilare

  • deeptimishra 33w

    Kya tum itne kamzor ho?
    Kaise khud ko itna mehsus kra dete ho ki ye bhul jate ho... Jo tum feel krne ho voh dil ki dhadkan se nahi dimag k hormone ka khel hai.
    Jab prblm ki jab dimag hai to solution bhi vohi milega.
    Ye tumne khud ko kitna uljha rkha hai.
    #suicidalthoughts#depression#lonlinees

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    Tumne khud ko daba rkha hai,,
    Tum ne dimagi kriyayo ka karn dil ko bna rkha hai
    Tum udas ho,, ye tumne dimag ko samjha rkha hai
    Tumne is halat ko na chhodne ka chunav kiya hai
    Jimma khud k halat ka savyam pe loge,,
    To sudhar k malik bhi tum khud hoge,,

    Tumne halat ki wajah hi,,kisi or k naam rkha hai
    Hath to tumne tbhi se utha rkha hai..
    Puri kaynat tume basti hai,, or tumne khud ko akela kar rkha hai,,
    Tum mano ya naa mano..
    Tumhari zindagi k kalaakaar tum khud ho..
    Par tumne "kalam"halato ko thamba rkha hai,,

    Jise tum dil ka khel smjh rhe ho..
    Voh dimag ki karastani hai
    Or jaisa tumne chaha waisi hi aaj tumhari ye zindagani hai❤

  • ndichuu 44w

    THE BIG TOWN OF MUMBAI.

    It all started with a hi.
    But he wanted something high.
    So he strengthened our bond as time went by.
    Sexy was my thigh.
    But just a minor of five years was what I,
    Was, in the big town of Mumbai.

    This is an outcry of molest.
    A surreal I call a nightmare.
    An ugly picture of abuse.
    A sculptor of hate, disdain, guilt and self hate.
    From a girl in the big town of Mumbai.

    I didn't know what it was.
    I didn't know what was it's cause.
    Painted with the colours of lust.
    Sang with the voices of mourns.
    Woke up with a sore body everyday.
    With my eyes red, writing off the night's history.
    A history that everyone ignored.

    This is an outcry of molest.
    A surreal I call a nightmare.
    An ugly picture of abuse.
    A sculptor of hate, disdain, guilt and self hate.
    From a girl in the big town of Mumbai.

    It was a home filled with people.
    But I was still lonely and feeble.
    The moon always lit the nights.
    But no one saw what happened behind the door.
    His smile symbolised pain.
    And was coupled with his deep set of eyes,
    That dug beyond my underwear.
    And for me, everyday all was too much to bear.

    This is an outcry of molest.
    A surreal I call a nightmare.
    An ugly picture of abuse.
    A sculptor of hate, disdain, guilt and self hate.
    From a girl in the big town of Mumbai.

    Sounds of fear.
    Voices of conundrum.
    Colours of hate.
    Paintings of death-wish.
    A place I was to call a home.
    Broke me to shreds, I had no home.
    Feel the words that are bleeding,
    From a heart crying for stitches.
    And a soul crying for a 'rest in peace'.

    This is an outcry of molest.
    A surreal I call a nightmare.
    An ugly picture of abuse.
    A sculptor of hate, disdain, guilt and self hate.
    From a girl in the big town of Mumbai.

    ~Ndichu.~

    #mirakee #rape #molest #pain #suicidalthoughts #suicide #pain #fear #selfhate #abuse #death #deathwish #sorebody #hate #stitches #disdain #guilt #Mumbai #nightmare #outcry #lust #mourns #underwear #toomuchtobear #restinpeace #redeyes #ignorance

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    Sounds of fear.
    Voices of conundrum.
    Colours of hate.
    Paintings of death-wish.
    A place I was to call a home.
    Broke me to shreds, I had no home.
    Feel the words that are bleeding,
    From a heart crying for stitches.
    And a soul crying for a 'rest in peace'.

    This is an outcry of molest.
    A surreal I call a nightmare.
    An ugly picture of abuse.
    A sculptor of hate, disdain, guilt and self hate.
    From a girl in the big town of Mumbai.


    ©ndichuu

  • stateofmind 46w

    When you're down
    And those that you expect to have your back and help you up
    Just pass you by like you don't exist.
    When all you have are your tears and regrets,
    And they are the only healing you have
    You will realize how strong you are.
    You will finally see them for what they are
    Your only salvation.
    When you're at rock bottom or very close
    So close you can smell the bottom
    Then you will know that you are a force by yourself
    So, rise up and take your L
    Take it like the unbreakable champion that you are
    You will learn to protect your energy
    Because the real ones are not everywhere
    They are not in the open.
    You are your own shoulder to cry on
    Remember when you curled up in the fetal position
    And just wished to die?
    When you felt like trash because you realized
    You didn't even have the strength to end it all?
    When they called you coward to your face
    Because you refused to dance to their tune.
    Take all that and own it.
    Your pain is your salvation. Use it
    ©stateofmind

  • meyohwrites 51w

    Pretty face
    With a mind that is full of suicidal thoughts and poetry
    ©meyohwrites

  • mooniverse 54w

    Isn't it pathetic to not have something as common as a dream?
    Lost at sea,
    gazing at the stars longingly,
    hoping to find a haven of belongingness.
    However, the society always shunned the ones who dared to look up at the stars,
    being several light years away.

    Stalled in yesterday
    i was stuck in between the unceasing ticking
    of the minute and hour hands;
    everyone else in a tomorrow–
    running behind numbers.
    (i didn't want to stay behind)

    They said that it would all be fine once i go to university,
    hence i deluded myself into taking a degree
    (not for myself) it was always for them.

    It didn't take me long to realize that
    university is a place where you only learn to run behind numbers,
    to slave away under the oppressive capitalistic expectations,
    chasing after a mirage of what they called– a ������������������ future
    that is nothing but just another monochromatic product of capitalism.

    I tried burrying this truth
    in the deepest pits of my graveyard mind,
    but this truth had never been a corpse
    as it resurfaced into the horizon.
    Turns out that i had never been good at funerals.

    I was terrified of confronting the truth again,
    so skipping classes became my norm.
    i wasn't trying to be cool– just rebellious.

    Exams and responsibilities loomed over my shoulders,
    like dark clouds.
    I didn't mind getting drenched in rain,
    it was just the storm of impending doom and failure
    that terrified me.

    They say that I'm wasting time,
    but they don't know how I'm losing a track of time,
    as i constantly feel dissociated.
    They say that I'm sabotaging my life, jeopardising my future–
    but aren't i already a train wreck?
    might as well wreck myself even more until there's nothing left.

    It feels like I've become a monster–
    a monster that locked itself in the closet
    and tried shrinking its body into nothingness.
    The society tried taming me
    but if you try putting a jester's hat
    on a monster
    it ceases to be scary
    but to itself, it's still a monster.

    –suheena


    ~~~~

    #poem #poetry #poetscommunity #writersnetwork #writerspoint #mirakee #pod #depression #anxiety #mentalhealth #suicidalthoughts #dissociation #nodreams #societyisabitch #universityisabitch #capitalism #monster @writersnetwork @mirakee

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    ©mooniverse

  • mooniverse 54w

    tw// suicidal ideation, depression.

    ������������������
    (��) �������������� �������� ������'���� ���������� ���� �������� ���� �������� ������ �������������� ������������ ������.

    If i disappear right now,
    i will leave no indentations behind–
    no footprints on wet sand.
    Like a ghost in my own body–
    breathing, but barely alive;
    floating in a chasm of nothingness
    but barely afloat.

    I'm a ghost lost in the halls of my own abode,
    whose empty walls i had tried painting
    with memories and polaroids;
    but fogginess clowded my senses,
    icicles snaking over my quivering limbs–
    everything was wiped away
    before i could even lift that damn paintbrush.

    Feeling too small for a world so vast–
    i tried folding my pain inside unread envelopes,
    dreams folded into paper planes flying in a sky
    parched open by the flames of a crimson moon.
    Trapped inside a time capsule–
    i keep living in yesterday,
    everyone else running in a tomorrow
    i can never touch.

    Now, i find myself dwindling out of reach
    in this abandoned house that can never be called a home,
    with molds festering each wall–
    reeking of dead winter
    ever since the beginning of march.

    I have tucked myself so far away
    that it feels like I'm walking at the edge of a cliff–
    the clamour of the city turning static and distant,
    only the deafening silence enveloping me.

    I'm standing here,
    waiting to be thrown off into the arms of nothingness–
    right leg dangling over the edge
    and left leg grounded on this barren land.

    Despite my despiration to let go,
    I'm transfixed by something in the pits of my gut that I can't seem to fathom.
    I'm frozen–
    the voices in my head berate me,
    calling me a coward,
    unable to take the final leap.

    In this moment,
    i can feel vines crawling over my limbs
    wrapping themselves around my throat–
    smoke flaring into my nostrils
    and seething my lungs
    as they sink their smothering claws within;
    I can't breathe.

    Despirately gasping for oxygen,
    i now stand here, shaking over the egde
    at a magnitude of a 9.5 earthquake;
    wanting the same earth to swallow me whole–
    would it all be over then?

    —suheena

    ~~~~

    #poem #poetry #poetscommunity #writersnetwork #writerspoint #mirakee #pod #depression #anxiety #mentalhealth #suicidalthoughts #dissociation #suicidalideation #ellipsism @writersnetwork @mirakee

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    ellipsism

    (n) sadness that you'll never be able to know how history turned out.

    [poem in caption]

    ©mooniverse

  • miss_basu 57w

    Suicide

    "Suicide"- this word always gives us a trembling sensation. Suicide, a very common negative approach of 21st century, people commit suicide, no they just don't want to put an end to their life, they just want to runaway from difficult situations. Well I myself is a survivor of suicide. If I would have died, things in my life would have changed perhaps it wouldn't, I don't know, but ending up life is never a solution, I realised. So whoever is reading this, if you're depressed, prone to suicidal thoughts, darling this is for you. "Don't end up your life, rather smile and say, you can overcome the situation. Your problem maybe strong, but God is strongest." And if you are atheist, tell yourself, "you have the unbordered power to resolve your problem." Stay positive, stay happy.
    - On account of World Suicide Prevention Day.
    ©miss_basu

  • shriyaselwal 63w

    While Sitting in the corner
    She was Crying,
    Nobody listened her voice
    Because her soul was dying.

    However, She was hurt
    She wanted to live up,
    But all the circumstances she was facing broke her
    And mentally she was ready to give up.

    She took a deep breath
    Took a paper and pen,
    After writing some feelings on that
    She was looking at the fan.

    More than ink of pen
    Her tears were expressing her pain,
    The page wasn't filled with words
    But with the emotions expressing by her tears
    Again and again.

    While wondering about her people
    She cried,
    Asking God why it happened to her
    Say it once that this situation doesn't exist
    And It's all lie.

    With making herself strong
    She took a knife
    Her hands were shivering
    Perhaps, they didn't want to end the life

    She was compelled
    Her soul Wanted to scream,
    She felt herself unable
    To complete anything not even her dream.

    She wasn't broken by others, It is unbelievable that It was her own people who brought her life to death.

    Suddenly the phone rings. While sobbing, she answered it.
    A voice came from other side
    "Are you alright?
    I know what you must be thinking,
    Do not worry.
    Those words of concerned handled her so easily.
    All those stressful Fights,
    kills her mentally every night.

    That Person was continuously encouraging her.
    "It is never lasting pain of your life
    you never have to give up,
    Make it your opportunity
    And live yourself up.

    She thinks about the call
    which she gets every night..
    No one sees her eyes full of tear,
    Whereas, the person on other side of the call feels her silence and gives her strength to bear.


    #sad #suicide #suicidalthoughts #pain #broken #mirakee #mirakeepost #writersnetwork @mirakee @writersnetwork @solitarygirl_

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    Suicide is never the answer.

    ©shriyaselwal

  • amithchhabria 64w

    These thoughts, oh so hollow, I try to calm my soul, and not let it grow,
    But oh the pictures it paints, my mind it hurts and the pain would just follow,
    It kills a part of me everyday, in every imaginable way and I become slow,
    Everytime I try to convey this, I end up having nothing to say,
    May be the anxiety gets to me and it stops me at the bay,
    I pray for I am not out to prey and all I want for now, is to run away,
    These thoughts may be terrible, but not the truth, my heart does know,
    But I pity my brain, this harsh reality it cannot fathom to swallow,
    It's cast an illusion on me, that I can't choose to ignore,
    For it seems too true to let go, and the voices I hear are causing an uproar,
    Asking me to take my own life, now that would be a new low,
    Waited for it to fade, tried to knock on every door,
    Help did come from the last place I'd hope,
    But when life does take away that too, you fall back on to the floor so low that's so hollow,
    All my life beside me there was only a shadow,
    Light came to me but my trust it broke !
    I prayed mindlessly for motivation for months, but the voices just grew stronger every second.
    And it was one day, a new light did burn far away, it felt miraculous in a way,
    Strange it was the feeling, for I knew this was the destiny at play,
    I cannot deny, but the hollowness did get filled with a motive to stay !
    The voices vividly gone and the thoughts took a break !
    Things today, are truly terrific at best, and I finally feel I can take a rest.
    ©AmithChhabria

  • merlthepoet 67w

    Abba father,let your will be done!


    ©merlthepoet

  • sun_writer 70w

    Wrote this a few days before sushant did what he did, felt broken then and decided not to anymore.. Hope some others can get stronger too.
    #mirakee #suicidalthoughts
    #Georgefloyd #covid #corona #writersnetwork

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    Life lately

    Lately Life's been so bleak
    All black,with no silver streak
    It's the year of the pandemic
    The year of protests, locusts and what not
    And if that wasn't enough, goddamn it's hot
    I can feel my brain melting away alongwith
    the will to live, or do anything productive
    Filled is my mind, with thoughts all self destructive
    Barely holding on in this black ocean
    On a raft called friendship, & through suppressing emotion
    Can't let a tear fall down, can't tell anyone i am weak
    Because the situation around, is already so bleak
    What does my grief matter, when people die for a couple dollars
    Deaths all around, people wearing fear like collars
    A step towards the future, and a bit of hope
    Or a ceiling fan, and a rope
    The choice is not an easy one to make
    Because more than my own life is at stake
    The smiles of my family and friends
    The people who stood up with me on all my life bends
    There are Some people i can't let down
    And that's why, i am holding on.. Not ready to drown
    Life maybe all black and bleak
    No matter how tiny, But theres always a silver streak..
    Just look closely and you will find it..
    #aj_writes
    ©mr_cheesy