Stop chasing shadows, stop being in a myth. You considered something as your happiness and your home and that whole thought shatters when you wake up. Maybe if you would have invested so much of your efforts and time in no one else but you ,no one would have turned their back on you saying you were'nt good enough ever. You invest so much into something emotionally, mentally and physically and when that thing makes you feel the most worthless in this entire world, you start to realise that maybe you are all you have and it feels tiring to even think of the journey you have to make to overcome from all of this , it may take days, months or even years till you will finally feel content with yourself. But its either continue living with this scar forever or heal yourself over and over again until you actual heal. Maybe you will overcome it, maybe you wont. But the hope is only to have enough strength and courage to continue this journey of life.