Yes, I know you went to the party
I don't need to see your gorgeous face
To know my confidence could shatter like a vase
Dear Jane, I'm not doing so well.
Can you tell?
I've been crying and sleeping
Not really eating
I tried to get up, I tried to get out of this murk,
But I fall to pieces like clockwork.
I'm like a beautiful example of a rut,
I'm moving but really I'm stuck.
Dear Jane, I want to see the mountains before I die
I want to count the stars and fall into the sky
I want to touch the ocean floor,
I want to feel for once the love and not the war.
But you're too beautiful to know these prayers
Your heart isn't buried beneath a hundred thousand layers
Like the butterfly effect,
Was it one little action that lead to this defect?
I don't really want to leave,
I'm begging you, please
The melodies flow and drown the pain
How much hate can I retain
The scars show through a sweater now,
How much longer before I must bow?
Sometimes at night I forget to fall asleep,
My worries and thoughts take so much upkeep
I'm so anxious about what others judge,
I smile and laugh, don't keep a grudge
Dear Jane, I make it beautiful!
I see you being social, like usual
I want what you have, I won't give it back
Does it seem I'm just fine?
Because lately I've been struggling at where to draw the line.
I could go all the way,
I could be here and gone today.
But that's a commitment, and I'm scared of those
So I'll line up my cares in millions of rows
And forget them, I'll leave it
Who has time for this shit?
Dear Jane, I drank water today
It's not better but I'll stay.
Life better have a twist in the road because I need a change
How do people not think these thoughts?
That's so strange.
So Dear Jane, don't worry.
Because yes, the red line is blurry,
Yes, I reached out only in my darkest moment
And yes, I could take this as an omen
But I am broken into a kaleidoscope
And now I seal these letters in an envelope.
Dear Jane, I hope you're okay.
I hope the tears don't come silent,
I hope your soul's still defiant
I hope the best for us, my Jane.
Because in our faultless hearts, we're the same.