The Invisible Currents
I saw one of your pics today, and whenever I do, I feel as if something is keeping us close, even if we aren't. Do you feel the same? I wish you did because I wouldn't have to imagine telling you everything. Or should I say I wouldn't have to write this in the first place? I know you aren't going to read this, but whenever you do, I want you to know that there's this thing that keeps bringing me back to you, but I try a little harder to be far away from you every time I see something related to you, but what about that thing which wants me to be around you? Maybe I will let it die in silence and observe you and the smile you keep spreading just because you are more happy with me not around you. Whatever the reason for your happiness, I am pretty sure it's not me, so let's go where I am wanted? A place where I am "me" and accepted the way I am. But the most saddening reality is that I need to be away from you, even after knowing that that thing is pulling me towards you, and it feels like I am going against the currents. I hope I won't stumble along this journey while travelling against the invisible currents because if I ever did, I will wish you to be around me, and that wish will never come true and remain a "wish" for the rest of my life.
_ Utkarsha Kalambe
Dt. 6 August 2021 @1:17 hrs IST