#longpost

92 posts
  • kanikachugh 1w

    Happy fearlessness to you!!

    The other day I was watching 'Midnight in Paris' when one particular scene boxed me up in a moment I still can't let it go. Though I had watched it years ago but this time it created ripples of enlightenment and so wanted to share.
    Hemingway said,

    .....
    "You two are the only ones in the entire universe. You conquer what most lesser men have never conquered before, you have conquered a great woman’s heart, the most vulnerable thing she can offer to another. Death no longer lingers in the mind. Fear no longer clouds your heart. Only passion for living, and for loving, become your sole reality. This is no easy task for it takes insurmountable courage. But remember this, for that moment when you are making love with a woman of true greatness you will feel immortal.
    I believe that love that is true and real creates a respite from death. All cowardice comes from not loving or not loving well, which is the same thing. And when the man who is brave and true looks death squarely in the face like some rhino hunters I know or Belmonte, who is truly brave, it is because they love with sufficient passion to push death out of their minds. Until it returns, as it does to all men. And then you must make really good love again. Think about it."
    .....

    You see, there were so many artists, writers, poets, musicians that landed here like metaphorical storms to sweep the lost souls like us in their whirlpool because they weren't satisfied with the mediocre nuances this world had to offer.
    They were(and are) fearless, valiant in their crafts, unafraid to show their shackled talent, with their intrepid spirits to look directly at the Sun, challenging it's brilliance.
    They could deep dive in the valley of pessimism and still pluck out the sparkling wisdom and unflinchingly, shared it with the world.

    If only they were fearful, unsure of their work like many of us, we would have missed Dali's surreal paintings, Buñuel's commercial successes, Hemingway's poignant attempts of filling our hearts with dreams to live in a library.

    What I understood is we artists/writers will always be unsure of our art, will always fear what we are putting out there, will always look for some sort of validation and its non-response would affect our bones and spirits.
    But just imagine, being free from all of it. Being so unapologetic like fireworks, pushing everything down and lighting up our own sky with whatever form we have. And we owe it to ourselves, because of that little voice that whispers and sometimes, yell to come out, because our thirst isn't easily quenched, because we look at the world with a tilted angle while others lie down comfortably to avoid getting nauseatic, because we believe we are too loyal to this world to not give back the conjured magic of rustling leaves, to not bleed poetry with the knives of verses impaling us, to not dance on our tunes to leave traumatic pain behind.

    The fear of death isn't just of death, it's of all the insecurities, apprehensions that house in us and partially submerge our feet in thick layers of blocks preventing us from moving forward.

    I wish all of you (and me) 'fearlessness in our work.'

    ©kanikachugh

  • writtersfeelingz 2w

    Change over ...

    Nothing left to change
    Nothing left to blame
    Nothing left to recover
    Nothing left to assort
    Nothing left to adsorb
    Nothing left to reflect

    Let's moon be Sun...
    Once again....
    Let nothing be someone's
    Something again...
    ©writtersfeelingz

  • kanikachugh 4w

    #longpost
    #random

    bit busy, soon be back to read all of you.

    Read More

    You

    The wind, the skies, the fields, my whole universe revolves around you. You are much more than words can ever explain. The smile on your face twinkles in my eyes wherein my each heartbeat is devoted to make that happen. The craving I have to look at you one more time are like the glimpses of heaven for me. It's where my uproar rests in tranquil state.
    My loneliness that knew nothing except darkness now welcomes your light through a keyhole devouring my nights piece by piece.

    The kind of love you carry lasts the ages. So when that love is ill-treated it makes me livid. I go insane when it isn’t valued, appreciated or returned with equal elegance. I feel like somebody jabbed a piercing weapon into my skin, pulled out my heart and placed it in front of me where it is frantically suffering and I, being all helpless, cannot do anything except witnessing it till it breaks. I can sacrifice my entire world for you and your smile. I feel as though I was made for you. That my demons surrendered and sworn to fight off yours to offer the love you deserve. This is how my craziness finds peace near you allowing you to enter into my prayers.
    You are the sunlight people can’t bear to stand for long. Though you try to adapt in the clouds for them but that isn’t you are supposed to do. You need to shine as bright as possible even if it makes people turn away from you.

    Those yearnings, wailing go beyond my control where I long to touch you, to hold you, to be close to you yet I have my fill when a beguiling little curve adorns your face than any other jewels ever could. This inexplicable edgy feeling which makes me run towards you all the time, rests so peacefully after looking into your eyes. Those powerful desires having meager demands just to see you one more time, is nothing less than a miracle.
    Restless are those who try to find peace in the worldly things, for my soul rested calmly after a taste of your alluring gaze.


    ©kanikachugh

  • infectiouswordspoetry 17w

    I know these days have been though- almost as if a bag is packed over its limit to carry any further and still you keep stuffing things. I have always believed that the universe gives a chance to smile to everyone- so what, it’s not your day to smile today.  I think our life is a planning… why? - Because since childhood we make up our mind to become something that links us to success, name, fame but as we grow we chalk a full proof plan. But I guess life is all about planning, no not the same in every person’s life. I love Science, Computers, and English. The last 3 years while I was graduating I felt I was in a balancing boat. Imagine this. You decide to stand up in a moving boat in the middle of the river and the boat starts disbalancing. I’m always in this rift thinking if I’m doing what I love in equal measures. But yes, maybe we are all on the right track- maybe we are all blessed with this power, haired from the universe and along wanting to achieve and seeking we face love, care, rejections, heartbreaks, discovering and importantly struggles.
    I know, I’m not disrespecting expectations and not ruining purpose or even ruining my ambitions. I’m just balancing. I’ll do it well until my energy would reduce to an atom or worse when I’ll give up- I know I have made mistakes and unlike my books I can’t edit them. It’s noticing and noting all your flaws and I know, in my heart the universe will forgive me for the blunders I created, for the people I couldn’t really forget and forgive, for the memories that play like my favorite song on loop and I know, it is just going to get better. 
    ©infectiouswordspoetry

  • miss_wannabe_writer 22w

    तुम नहीं...

    तुम नहीं तो ना सही,
    तुम्हारी वो बिसरी-सी याद सही,
    तुम नहीं तो ना सही,
    तुम्हारी वो अधूरी-सी मुलाक़ात सही,
    तुम नहीं तो ना सही,
    तुम्हारी वो अनकही-सी बात सही,
    तुम नहीं तो ना सही,
    तुम्हारी वो अनसुनी-सी फरियाद सही।।

    तुम नहीं तो ना सही,
    खैर, हम नहीं तो ना सही...
    पर,
    तुम्हारा खुद से खुद को ढूँढना सही।
    तुम्हारा खुद से खुद का पाना सही।
    तुम्हारे लिए 'तुम' जरूरी हो
    ये समझना सही।।
    और 'गर उसके लिए,
    जो "मैं" नहीं...
    तो ना सही।।

    ©miss_wannabe_writer

  • miss_wannabe_writer 23w

    ।।बदलाव।।

    अरसे बाद मिला जब मुझसे,
    देखते ही कहा,
    बदल गई हो तुम।

    अब तुम्हारी आंखों में वो शरारती-सी चमक नहीं,
    अब तुम्हारे बाल यूँ ही खुल के बिखर जाते नहीं,
    अब तुम्हारे लहज़े में वो पहले वाली हया नहीं...

    अब भी रो पड़ती हो हर छोटी बात पर?
    अब भी लड़ जाती हो हर इनकार पर?
    अब भी करती हो ज़िद मुंह फुला कर?

    बेशक़ खूबसूरत पहले से ज़्यादा हो अब,
    पर तुम्हारी चेहरे की ये खुशी,
    ये बेपरवाह हसीं,
    सब बनावटी-सी लग रही हैं मुझे...

    तुम्हारी नज़रों में फिक्र नहीं पर बेरुख़ी है अब,
    तुम्हारे अंदाज़े में कुछ गुरुर-सा है अब,
    झल्ली-सी उस लड़की को कहाँ छोड़ आई तुम?
    सच, पहले से बहुत ज़्यादा बदल गई हो तुम...

    बात खत्म हुई और आगे बढ़ गए हम,
    अब कैसे उसे बताती कि
    मैंने खुद को कितना समझाया है,
    कैसे उसे बताती कि
    उसे भूलने के लिए ही तो मैंने खुद को भुलाया हैं।।

    ©miss_wannabe_writer

  • surabhig 28w

    #journalprompt
    #wod
    #pod
    #longpost
    #longpostalert

    Today, 24th may 2021, the most usual day as it would be.
    I woke up got fresh and started the daily music dose, to bear the regularity of life.
    Then, i opened my laptop and started to glance through the mails, that will eat up my head today.
    It was a very boring and a regular Monday morning, everyone was wishing good morning on our group chat, being a work from home culture !!

    While my tasks for the day were being planned,
    I got a message from a colleague,
    Saying pls do this,
    She wasn't my boss,
    Neither any senior,
    Just as me, the same level junior,
    It hit me hard as her tone,
    Wasn't cool,
    Ordering me, was never her tool.

    I was upset and moreover distressed,
    Monday morning,
    And such troubling,
    Was all i could anticipate.

    Its with deep breaths,
    That i got somehow,
    Back to normal,
    Carrying out some tasks,
    Making myself little stronger.

    To all the rescue then comes,
    My best friend,
    My office survival kit,
    Is his name,
    As the name,
    So is the fame,
    Work, help and what not to say.

    I ranted and ranted,
    About all the politics,
    I knew he was the only one,
    Who could understand,
    Without judging,
    I always had a crush on him,
    More than looks,
    His deeds,
    Impressed me.

    His nature and always there for me,
    These things went on adding,
    That feeling to me,
    If only i had him,
    Besides,
    Not only as a work partner,
    But someone to say as partner of life,
    What fun would the act of surviving be.

    It turned upside down,
    When he said,
    He is looking for a switch,
    My mind was almost down the rail,
    Looking and wondering,
    How to survive,
    In his absence.

    From Dreaming of him,
    To Being my partner forever,
    To settling down,
    With hidden crush,
    And then office colleague,
    To a best friend's zone,
    There was a storm within me,
    How would i survive,
    If my kit is lost,
    I would definitely,
    Loose in the wait of his hault.

    Read More

    The fear of absence

    ©surabhig

  • psychologygirl 40w

    MUST READ POST

    Do you heard about AYESHA from Ahmedabad?

    You must be, if not she committed suicide on 25th last month releasing a video as her husband tortured her brutally.

    is MENTAL TORTURE a big think?

    Okay we'll get into this later.

    Have to seen dove's new Ad
    #StopTheBeautyTest

    Is there a Correlation between the two?

    Okay lets take one more example:
    Few days back one family came to my house for my rista.
    My father told me to apply BB Cream to look white and he said

    "Apan ko kisi bhi halat me apne aap ko pasand karvana hi hai iss bar. Aur unhone aap se pucha ki ap shadi ke bad padhyengi ya job krengi to apko "haan" nahi bolna hai, apko bolna hai jese apke ghar me hoga me vesa karungi"

    That uncle asked my father-
    Shadi me aap kitna karcha karengy?
    Or apni beti ko kya kya dengy?


    Ahh! Can you now see the correlation!

    Every girl has been told:

    "Bardast karna seekho"
    "Ladki ghar se dulhan banke jaati hai par vapis अर्थी mehi aati hai"
    Etc etc.....

    1) First correct this "BARDAST" meaning and set a limit.
    2) Dont push your daughter's into a Marriage where her worth is not weighted
    3) Accept "TALAAK" as an option. Do not think what others will say.
    4) take "Pre-Matrial counseling" to fill those missing gaps.
    5) Compromise and adjustments are part of every relationship but that's not a thing of only one partner.
    6) As a parent , Make your daughters Believe that you'll be there no matter what.


    As a girl what can you do?

    1) Observe thoroughly
    2)Talk straightforward
    3)check whether there's possibility of Compromise! If yes, is it from both the sides?
    4) Do not marry someone when you're heart is saying No.
    5) where DEMANDS are first, you first and last option should be always NO
    6)You can never be without an option remember that and allah is with you.

    **jiski jaha kismat hai,
    rista wahi hota hai.
    Talaaq ke bad bhi,
    Dubara nikaah hota hai**


    ©psychologygirl

  • shivatado 44w

    Ever wondered about your existence?
    Have you ever tried to find answers to your questions?
    Have you?????

    @mirakee @writersnetwork @mirakeeworld @readwriteunite @writerstolli #myself #I #longpost #poetry #life

    Read More

    Lost in the identity of self,
    I searched the meaningful,
    Least, what I could get,
    Is not that same regret.

    Many published their ideas of me,
    I picked and chose that seem close,
    To my doubts, to my fake
    I remain slept throughout, yet I was awake.

    Truth, what an easy goal I found,
    I listened, contradicted, ignored my mind,
    Silence, echoed the loudest noise,
    Wisdom is rare, but who isn't wise?

    Took alternate routes for same destiny,
    Wanderer me, confused the journey,
    Is it the path that holds importance?
    Or, is it the mind over matter.

    Seeking the confidential of origin,
    The original me is lying in open,
    Will there be answers for my questions?
    Or will I myself remain a question?
    ©shivtado

  • fallency 46w

    #life #wod
    #writersnetwork
    #longpost
    #skipifyouwant
    #nothingserious

    Dear @writersnetwork, thank you for the ❤️
    #wnliked

    Life is beautiful. Everyone says so. I have accepted it as a fact. As I have accepted that sun rises in west on venus. I know how many planets are there in the solar system, I know, I am nothing but a speck in this vast universe, I have memorised it all and can repeat the same when suited.

    Because when I tell people that though I know, I would like to experience it with my own eyes, they make fun of me.

    For when I tell people that life is not beautiful at times, they lecture me, forcing me to accept that it is beautiful.

    When I was young and naive, I used to argue with people that I have yet to see the glimmer and spark of beauty in life, they taught me that one should appreciate the small things and live life without any regrets.

    But they don't know that I have regrets. They don't know that I am nothing but a tattered cloth covering up my bruised soul.

    They force me to see the brighter sides and I know, I have accepted that life is good. But they don't know that life has its darker moments too and there is no shame in accepting it.

    I know life is beautiful with all the shortcomings. I smile vividly at the good things but I also cry bitterly at the bad ones.

    I have always believed that if you see only the brighter colours then, darker shades start losing essence and eventually, brighter shades will lose the glimmer too.

    Hence, I apprecite both shades. I draw my sky with black but my moon is pure white. I let my candle burn brightly in the dark night. I know that sometimes I fly while other times, I find it hard to crawl.

    But if you ask me about life, I will tell you that it is beautiful and show you my widest smile.

    Read More

    Life

    ©fallency

  • psychologygirl 49w

    #marriage #woman #longpost #equality #discrimination #ego #writersnetwork

    It's been 37 years of Marriage ,
    Still they dont like each other.

    It's been 36 years of parenthood ,
    Still they don't equally love their children's.

    Years are getting older
    Not the people.

    I wonder where is love here ?

    All i can see is EGO.

    These three letters are heavier than a cloud.

    You aren't ready to listen.
    You force people to listen you.

    A very thin line between asking and getting...

    If you don't respect your people
    There's nothing you learned in life.

    Maybe less educated woman don't match your status.
    Maybe your daughter don't listen to you.

    But you can't divorce a man just because he's dominating?

    Or can you ?

    You can, but society will not accept this reason.

    But it's fine, perfectly fine living with a person who doesn't value you, you also don't like him.
    But it's okay.

    Atleast you are married

    And it's not important "THAT YOU'RE NOT HAPPILY MARRIED"

    ©psychologygirl

    Read More

    EGO

    Read caption

  • psychologygirl 49w

    Just a thought

    People really dont know "How you feel" ?

    Maybe because they don't "think like you"

    But we expect them to "accept ourself" as we are.

    Your thoughts are on rear view mirror
    And those people are the indication

    "Objects in the Mirror Are Closer Than They Appear"

    You're thinking more about "can you make it"

    Rather than "try it one more time"

    Nothing is fixed man !
    You can shift and adjust....

    Why you're running from yourself
    Or
    Why are you running ?

    You know all the answers
    But there deep inside you're worrying about the consequences.

    Don't be.
    Let it be.

    Take a deep breath.....
    Decide what you want actually.
    What is happiness for you ,
    Find that


    ©psychologygirl

  • pepper_16 71w

    Still waiting..!��❤️
    As I remember that musical love night.

    @pinknpurple @writersnetwork @adithir @mirakeeworld @writersbay

    #ecstasyc #poetry #longPost

    Read More

    ECSTASY.

    Raising goosebumps all over,
    You kissed again my shoulder.
    I was high
    You were my sky.
    I swayed gainst you, giggling
    Moans and ecstasy increasing.
    Music was loud,
    So was my stammering heart
    If it wasn't alcohol
    Then what it was?
    I wondered..
    As it worked wonders
    Whatever it was.
    Pleasure so appealing,
    I craved it more..
    You trailed kisses
    Making me sore.
    Sensous was the environment
    As we moved and peppered
    Love bites.
    Enchanting and blissful
    Our heaven looked like.
    I was in your arms,
    As my dress began to slip.
    I couldn't wait more, to be yours
    Desperate or whatever one may call.
    My nails dug deeper
    In the bewilderment of your hairs.
    I gasped aloud
    As you kissed and stared.
    Your hands worked smooth
    I mumbled like a whisper
    I was lost dancing
    As we talked Sinister.
    In laungauage of aliens
    Who just make sounds
    No words instead whimpers.
    My backless back
    When touched your presence
    I felt vulnerable and wanted
    In the crowd on the terrace.
    Terrace bar! Yeah!
    I pulled you closer,
    Heaved a sigh
    No! Don't tell me it was a lie.
    You played with my body
    In the best possible way.
    My lavender got mixed
    With your peaches hay.
    You Turned on
    My sensitive regions.
    From my black locks
    To my lesions.
    That night we made love
    In my dreams
    As you soon dissolved
    In the crowd and gleam.

    ©pepper_16

  • the_awkward_philosopher 75w

    And the sky changes colour
    To the calm blues like
    An old man sitting in the balcony
    And reading his days of youth
    From the dried up pages.
    And the sky turns to a fierce orange
    Like a flame dancing in the forest
    The flame that resembles a revolution
    Just like the revolution of the
    Africans in America for freedom
    Or that of the Indians against
    The British empire.
    Far in the shade of a banyan
    Two men are sitting
    Ignoring the comments of the
    Society and living their romance.
    In the temple two men
    One from the lower cast
    And one from the upper class
    Pray to the same god.
    The breeze flows freely
    Almost like taking all the
    Thoughts of inequality along
    With it to the barren deserts
    To be mixed with the soil.
    The birds chirp the songs
    Of the joy and ecstasy
    And a free mind by the
    Lake weaves a poem
    About the sunsets and revolutions.

    #mirakee #mirakeewriters #mirakeewriter #writer #writer #poets #longpost #readwriteunite #freedom #equality #sunsets #revolutions @mirakee @readwriteunite

    Read More

    Sunsets and revolutions

    And the sky changes colour
    From the calm blues like
    An old man sitting in the balcony
    And reading his days of youth
    From the dried up pages..
    ©the_awkward_philosopher

  • she_wrote 79w

    I need my own God .
    I need my own God who bleed profusely ,
    To my mother's shock, my whining could be heard by neighbours around.
    I saw neighbourhood aunty closing the door of her balcony when I demanded my mother about the God who bleeds profusely.
    It wasn't just a demand ,
    I wanted him to realise I genuinely craved for strength when the period was unbearable and my scarlet heart diminished with each passing moment on "those days".
    When it first began ,
    I was told that it was like "signing in" in the world of Womanhood
    Just like Facebook ,
    Wish I had knows it does comes with creeps like cramps and orthodox beliefs
    Once
    I heard my aunt say, "we are women , our spirit of womanhood can endure anything life throws at us".
    I wanted to ask, didn't it hurt her spirit to sleep in isolated hut in the farm and endure everything in seclusion?
    Strange enough ,
    My thoughts wander off to Panchal Kumari
    Who bled profusely when she was dragged to the court of men,
    She was the queen, slave they called her , whore it sound to many
    But she was human, vulnerable before those who humiliated her womanhood
    I wanted to ask was she also expected to endure anything?
    Maybe!
    Maybe she didn't endure and her vengeance led to the end of an entire Yug.
    Back to present
    My voice was loud and clear
    I wanted my own God
    So, to calm my senses
    Mother told me about the bleeding Goddess in Assam,
    The Scarlet fluid didn't hurt anyone till now
    Mighty men bow before her , no hesitation it seems to me then
    Even grandfather has paid a visit to her in his youth
    Yet my mind had still managed to confuse
    Then why men of the family abhorred the blood , stained or not it still hurt their pride
    My thoughts wandered off yet again
    I couldn't understand what mother tried to make me believe
    Was she telling me am I the goddess?
    Or was it my womanhood so strong that it could end this Yuga?


    I left the thought and prayed that day
    I asked the cosmos for a god of my own , who knew of moon cycle and extend its blessing on those women who were expected to endure everything in the name of shared womanhood.

    ©She_wrote
    Kanchan Balodi

    @writersnetwork
    @mirakee
    #pod #writersnetwork #mirakee #writersofmirakee #periods #mooncycle #society #life #stigma #life #womanhood #taboo #musing #longpost #menstrualhealth #breakthetaboo

    Read More

    Blood

    I heard my aunt say, "We are women, our spirit of womanhood can endure anything life throws at us".
    I wanted to ask, Didn't it hurt her spirit to sleep in isolated hut in the farm and endure everything in seclusion?

    ©she_wrote
    Kanchan Balodi

  • shrishti_11 80w

    If only my imagination could turn
    slums into palaces
    Bad into good
    Wars to peace
    I should think more .
    I should feel more,
    Because its an escape from reality
    It liberates my astral thoughts unlike the ones clutched in the manacles made by society.

    If only my imagination could turn
    Tragedy into comedy
    Philosophy into practicality
    And every love story to end happily.
    I should think more,
    I should feel more,
    Because no one can hurt me here
    I still can trust and move without any fear.

    If only my imagination could turn,
    The place I live in safer and healthier
    The land I strive on free from any malign or drear
    The world where we look after eachother
    I should think more,
    I should feel more.
    Because then I might be able to accept more of the mortal universe.

    #imagination #reality #mirakee #longpost

    Read More

    If only my imagination could turn...

  • the_awkward_philosopher 83w

    Paused

    Those who were running from
    Themselves in search of themselves
    Are now scared to face the mirrors.
    The ones who were busy with all
    The ideas and plans for tomorrow
    Are now struggling to keep
    Their brains thinking, working
    Afraid of the oblivion,
    Of the scarcity of thoughts
    That might occur.
    The whole world running
    Aimlessly to a destination
    That doesn't exist, now
    Just paused, still.
    The chaos of the roads
    And the screeching of the tyres.
    The hustle at the malls
    And the jogs at the parks.
    Everything just ceased
    Overtaken by a deep calm.
    One which was long forgotten
    A calm that people were scared of.
    A calm they were told was forbidden.
    A calm they didn't realize was possible.
    Amidst this calm, man faces himself
    And the nature heals itself,
    The sun has a little extra shine
    And the grass is a little extra greener
    On both the sides now
    The stars have a little extra shine
    And the sky has a little extra stars.
    The air has a little extra life
    And the man has a lot of extra time
    To write, to sing, to dance,
    To play, to talk, to make food,
    To live and not to run but walk.

    ©the_awkward_philosopher

  • sunofyah913 84w

    DRUNK ON DESPAIR
    (POEM)


    SO MANY HARSH DAYS GO BY AND I STILL CRY DON'T ASK ME WHY BUT WHEN I DIE (YOU'LL KNOW THE TRUTH),
    BUT AS FOR NOW IT'S GIN AND JUICE,
    I NEED TO DROWN ALL OF MY PAIN WITH SOMETHING STRONG TO KEEP ME TAMED,
    'CAUSE IF I DON'T I'D GO INSANE THE GIN IS SOOTHING FOR MY BRAIN,
    AND SO I NEED LIKE SEVERAL SHOTS THAT'S SEVERAL POURS THAT'S SEVERAL KNOCKS UPON MY CHEST BECAUSE IT BURNS MY VISION BLURS MY STOMACH TURNS MAYBE ONE DAY I'LL FINALLY LEARN THAT WHAT I WANT HAS TO BE EARNED I STORE MY HOPE INSIDE AN URN AND SEALED IT TIGHT I WON'T RETURN TO IT AT NIGHT NO ROOM FOR FAITH WITHIN MY LIFE JUST PASS THE PEN SO I CAN WRITE AND THEN AND THEN I FUCKING MIGHT BLOW UP THE SUN IT'S WAY TOO BRIGHT I HATE THAT SHIT I HATE THE LIGHT I LOVE DESPAIR IT'S A DELIGHT I LOVE THE PAIN IT DOES EXCITE I LOVE THE RAIN OH WHAT A SIGHT MY LOVE IS SLAIN MY CHEST IS TIGHT MY HEART IS DEAD I'M COLD AS ICE FUCK BEING GOOD FUCK BEING NICE FUCK SERVING GOD FUCK DOING RIGHT!

    ©SunofYah913

  • sunofyah913 84w

    FOR FUCKING SAKE
    (POEM)


    YOU THINK I TYPE BECAUSE I REALLY LIKE TO WRITE "WELL THAT'S NOT RIGHT" I ONLY WRITE SO I WON'T GO AND GRAB A GUN AND END MY LIFE ALL THROUGH THE NIGHT I HAVE TO FIGHT THE URGE TO CUT MYSELF AND SLICE MY ASS TO BITS (A KITCHEN KNIFE) COULD HELP WITH THIS DON'T WANT TO LIVE THERE'S TOO MUCH SHIT I HAVE TO TAKE CAN'T DEAL WITH THIS I'LL SURELY BREAK PLEASE LIFE JUST QUIT WITH THIS DISGRACE WHAT HAVE I DONE WHY DO YOU HATE MY ASS SO MUCH YOU TOOK MY HOPE IT'S IN YOUR CLUTCH AND CLOSED YOUR PALMS SO NOW IT'S CRUSHED GONE WITH THE WIND AND TURNED TO DUST WHY SHOULD I GIVE GOD ANY FUCKS WHEN MY BAD LUCK HAS HIT AND STRUCK IT'S LIKE A TRUCK THAT HAS NO BRAKES I ALWAYS CRASH AND SMASH MY FACE AND YOU'LL BE CRASS TO SAY IT'S FATE DON'T BE AN ASS YOU'RE NOT A SAINT DON'T ACT LIKE YOU DON'T MAKE MISTAKES DON'T ACT LIKE YOU'RE SOMETHING "SO GREAT" THAT DAMN FACADE TRULY FRUSTRATES ME TO NO END FOR FUCKING SAKE!

    ©SunofYah913

  • marynschmaryn 88w

    Sound, Vibrate: OFF

    My phone stays on silent. I can't stand the noise. It's an endless stream of people that don't know me asking for favors I can't fulfill. And it's just a constant reminder of the ways in which I am not enough and the ways in which I am not who I should be. My phone stays on silent, but I fall asleep with it on the charger next to my head. The dim blinking light brings me some small piece of comfort.

    I fall asleep and neither of us make a sound but I wake up throughout the night to see if I've missed anything. To see if there's anyone I need to say something empty back to.

    It is the most exhausting thing in the world, this feigning connectedness. I feel heartbroken for no reason. An unjustified sadness beats throughout me. The more that is asked of me, the less I want to give. I resent everyone who doesn't know me but I can't see the people that do.

    There's this ever-growing space between 1 and 2 and I don't know how to fill it. And I don't know how to make that bridge so

    my phone stays on silent.


    ©marynschmaryn