#journal

866 posts
  • devilfish 13h

    One Wish

    I look hollow to the cyber halo emitted from
    The sign that signals one to cross
    I wonder as my heart beats in my chest
    How many lives were lost in a blink from
    Blue
    To green
    To violent red
    Spinning carousels in kaleidoscopes
    Of vertigo with enough force to push across the atlantic
    And break the wings off a human angel
    It's so cruel how one choice and it could be fatal
    In the awareness
    All that's spatial
    Are we able to push past a nightmare
    Creeping breathing down our neck
    Reminding us living is eventually fatal
    What is it that is left
    The echo of a breath distinguished by the suffocating sunset And it's definitive silence
    Snatch our existential comfort from
    It's cradle
    To show us what we can really do
    And show us that we're able
    ©devilfish

  • devilfish 13h

    One Wish

    I look hollow to the cyber halo emitted from
    The sign that signals one to cross
    I wonder as my heart beats in my chest
    How many lives were lost in a blink from
    Blue
    To green
    To violent red
    Spinning carousels in kaleidoscopes
    Of vertigo with enough force to push across the atlantic
    And break the wings off a human angel
    It's so cruel how one choice and it could be fatal
    In the awareness
    All that's spatial
    Are we able to push past a nightmare
    Creeping breathing down our neck
    Reminding us living is eventually fatal
    What is it that is left
    The echo of a breath distinguished by the suffocating sunset And it's definitive silence
    Snatch our existential comfort from
    It's cradle
    To show us what we can really do
    And show us that we're able
    ©devilfish

  • devilfish 5d

    It Was Like a Movie

    Everything was moving
    Life was interacting
    I was gaining traction
    But that was just an illusion
    Because now I feel I'm losing
    Out of touch while my clutch is loosening
    Can't remember much of what
    I've been doing or what it's like to be innocent
    I'm clueless and I feel so stupid
    I'm not left with any choice but to be
    Ambivalent
    In all of it's indifference
    But not because I'm sad
    It's because everything keeps shifting
    Shadows switching positions
    And it never goes back
    Time never stops keeping track
    As you go in one direction only then can
    You feel my collection of words
    And they'll mean more to you
    Than cheap thrills and always second
    Guessing
    All your blessings
    I think you changed me
    I think I myself have lessened
    Don't want to admit it
    But I'm fading fast
    And losing effervescence
    But you did
    I did
    I'm peeling
    Pressing
    Seeking
    Truth
    I isolated myself on my island
    While I try to compute
    Why I exterminated
    The art of love
    Left behind my home
    My heart tells me it's urgent
    I must do the deed and put on my gloves
    Where you're sounds of crying
    Will no longer violate or touch me
    Because here it does
    ©devilfish

  • solemnmystery 1w

    The rusty journal.

    THE RUSTY JOURNAL ( Check the last post before reading this one. This one is in continuation of the last post. )

    It weighed heavier than it looks
    gained pounds from the pasted stuff,
    cards, wrappers, letters, bracelets and roses
    it's all in there,
    smells like a love story is cooking here.
    Small chits of emojis and message
    often glued at centre,
    drawing and potraits are drawn in interval
    making the journal more like a fantasy.

    The pages are charmeleon
    changing color as if alive,
    floral white cherished the new found love
    being bright, clear and cheerful,
    transformed to burly wood as
    traces of tears and ashes found,
    but finally remained saddle brown
    as if dipped in darkness.
    02/04/21
    ©solemnmystery

  • rimboche 1w

    അന്നത്തിൽ ഉപ്പ് എന്ന പോലെ ചിലരുണ്ട് നമ്മുടെയൊക്കെ ജീവിതത്തിൽ..

    ഒരു നേരം ഉപ്പില്ലാതെ ഒരുരുള ചോറ് കഴിക്കുമ്പോൾ എന്നപോലെ, ഇല്ലാണ്ടാവുമ്പോ മാത്രം ശ്രദ്ധിക്കപ്പെടുന്ന ചിലർ..

    ഒരുപക്ഷേ ജീവിതത്തിൽ അവർ എത്ര രുചി പകർന്നിരുന്നു എന്ന് നമ്മൾ ചിന്തിക്കുന്നതും അപ്പോൾ മാത്രമായിരിക്കും..


    ©rimboche

  • solemnmystery 1w

    The rusty journal.

    Below the pile of books
    hidden from everyone's sight
    there lies the notebook
    covered in dust and web.
    The brownish cover reads " Eternal Sunshine "
    with every letter engraved,
    it's tied with a coral ribbon
    with maple leaf on the cover.

    Two hands imprinted the maiden page
    with one being thick and hard
    while other remains thin and soft,
    they connote the start of a tale
    whose seed is just being sown,
    light incense of orchids spills
    as the pages turned on and on and on.

    To be continued...
    31/03/21
    ©solemnmystery

  • devilfish 2w

    Continuity and Streams

    I feel so deeply it's as if it were a dream
    I see life coming
    Death pulses as time breathes
    Only pain can measure what's left
    Of humanity
    And this free Sea if toxicity
    And toxic smog that lingers
    As it creeps
    With fingers it penetrates the ozone
    When the Earth sleeps
    Once peacefully
    Now it wakes up to dried streams
    And it's need that we force feed
    Pollutants at warped speed
    And we don't see
    As time reaps what was done in secrecy
    Has now come cloaked in karma's cut throat
    Reality that multiplies it's fury into the
    Knots of infinity
    Death is it's divinity
    Will Independence be enough to deliver
    Me to being self aware
    Freedom in letting go of expectations
    Liberty that lives in me
    Exalted in my essence
    I'm luminescent laying out clarity
    Im weaving lines of misspoken sanity
    I'm scrubbing the sores of vanity
    Ego won't calm calamity
    It's inanity is apparent in it's irrelevancy
    To our democracy propoganda is a pity
    Profanity inserts itself in mundanity
    Where it dirties our minds with willingness
    To falsifying ego and demonstrating our
    Superficiality
    Practicality and sensibilities
    Are abnormalities
    Because no one's understanding emotion
    Or depth in chaos
    They just laugh at me
    I isolate me
    I take care of me
    And nurture me
    I'm lonely but I must walk my own path
    Of destiny
    Pick up what's left of me
    And further me
    The art of truth
    Is a mirror
    Staring back at me
    Peering with concerned furrowed brows
    That identify with my unsettling
    Introspection
    And it seems to be my only company
    ©devilfish

  • gs_journals 2w

    My personal #journal , to who so ever.

    Read More

    Rustling leaves remind me of my own freedom. I see the open sky peeping through funny formations of cloud. They are moving. They are changing colours. They don’t have any option so they play amidst the shape of grey. I wish I could convey the joy of being one with whatever that I see. I wish I could take everyone along on the stroll. A glimpse of it can swallow the sufferings of the entire planet. Can we see that? When we can’t see, we can’t love and when we can’t love, we can’t live. Read or write this in which ever order. It’ll scream out loud the same thing. I feel creation is a constant action of forgiveness. You can only create when you are able to understand. To understand is to love. To love is to see. To see is to embrace. To embrace is to be one. To be one is to come back home. To come back home is to be immortal. Thank you!

  • gs_journals 2w

    I realised too soon that love stories of the world isn’t for me. The dates, walks, talks, more date walk talk with the same person over and over, endlessly, same time living over and over. Lying at the same place over and over, and now we can’t move, our bed have taken our shapes, the wrinkles on the sheets have become the map of whereabouts, look where all we’ve been. I know that it’ll take endless steps to walk away from here. But we’re going to walk because we’ve places to get lost into. Memories to forget. Stories to not tell. Thank you.

  • poukii 2w

    Myself, " The Flood".

    Monsoons started slowly by May-June.
    People glorified the rains in the beginning as it gave them a relief to the scorching sun.
    The dams,which had dried up,were starting to fill with water.
    Crops started to grow properly.
    Dehydration and skin diseases of people started to reduce.
    But, when rains started to become heavy by the beginning of July, people started to get threatened.
    And so, I started suddenly by the onset of August.
    Dams were overflowing with water,
    Water from dams reached houses upto 10 Km.
    Water level rosed upto 1st floor of houses.
    Crops were completely immersed in me and damaged.
    Pets and cattle fell dead due to my heavy flow.
    Furniture and equipments in home flowed away under my force.
    Vehicles were moving here and there.
    I made the small boats to occupy the roads.
    People moved to safe places in those small boats.
    Fishermen with their big boats were actively involved in rescuing people during my arrival.
    People who asked for help by showing hands in terrace, were rescued by the forces using helicopter.
    Necessary food,goods and medicines were delivered in relief camps using helicopter.
    People stayed in those camps for months.
    Those who returned home after my destructions, were struggling with depression for long time.

    All these things had broken my heart too.
    As I was not able to resist myself from forming due to heavy rains. I didn't had any other options.
    With all my heart and soul I want to apologise to people.
    I am happy that everyone irrespective of their caste, religion, gender united to help each other.It showed the power of humanity.I brought major transformation in the life of many . People learnt very important lessons in life for I was the darkness, that came into their life before light.

    I was described as "The biggest flood" that came after 3 decades.
    ©poukii

  • gs_journals 2w

    Your absence has taken away my whereabouts. Your image has left me blind. I see you all around. I’m cursed I hear your sufferings in every person I meet. I’m speechless. I don’t make any sense.
    Now I understand why do they have a pen name. You write-create to get rid of yourself. Then why would you take the credit? It’s abrupt! Defeats the purpose. It’s like fucking for virginity. This is my understanding and I can be totally wrong. I’m in case most cases. But does it even matter?

  • gs_journals 2w

    Reminder: If I draw a line. They’ll cross it!

  • devilfish 2w

    Shattered Glass

    Spring came
    And I feel the same sting
    From the ground
    As it devoured me
    I drown as my heart sinks
    In blame and bitter shame
    And my ears ring
    My tongue is tormented by the taste

    The pages of my past tear
    And the remaining are indistinct
    As I become less aware
    As my blood coats the sink
    As my thoughts drink my attention
    The deception before the drop off the brink
    Of my direction where it meets it's end
    Where the meaning is lost all my life
    In just one blink
    ©devilfish

  • gs_journals 2w

    I woke up in the middle of a rain. I looked around and saw everyone’s falling.

  • gs_journals 2w

    I remember times through my nose. Some smell so good that they end up my throat.

  • gs_journals 2w

    Every word is a gibberish. Now music hits me like a wind.

  • gs_journals 2w

    Honey I’m home. I would have apologised for being late. But then I realised, we don’t have time in here.

  • gs_journals 2w

    Letting go isn’t about separation. It’s about coming together. The most intimate relationships are a jam session of a constant let go, within each breath, within each movement. And when one fails to do so, you hold onto them, by letting go. This is the only way to love. Learn from everything around, how a tree let go’s itself listening to the new weather, how river let go’s itself as it meets the sea. We must learn to let go ourselves to meet another person, no matter where they are. Only then we can truly meet. Only then we can truly come together. Otherwise we’ll keep falling apart.

  • gs_journals 2w

    I often slip through your fingers and then you open your palms.

  • poukii 2w

    PAGES OF MY DIARY

    The overflowing pages of
    my old leather bound diary,
    is filled with,
    cherished moments of my first drama,
    filled with memories of flower girl dress.

    Ephipany from slaps in hands by teachers.

    Blissful moments during annual day.

    Memories of a melancholic soul, sitting beside the tree, staring at the children playing in ground.

    Agonising experiences of a teen girl,
    when she first started to bleed.

    Moments of a mother's love for her child,
    when she ties her hair in a tight braid.

    Moments of ecstasy,
    when declared as a topper in high school.

    Heartbroken memories of first love.

    Moments of euphoria created through listening sad music,by staring at moon and stars in the night sky.

    Deep despair to find out true self.

    Moments of anguish filled with,
    tears in pillow.

    Selcouth moments of rare deep talks.

    And in the end,
    Poetries filled with grief and deep unspoken emotions.
    ©poukii