I'm not even hungry. I only came here again because last time we made eye contact and I thought you smiled at my nothing eyes. This time you didn't even look at me. I would know, I was watching. Hoping for that. I guess it was all in my head next to everything else.
Some people just sit in small groups and laugh too much, too loud and too synchronised. If anyone is making you laugh that much then they should become a fucking comedian but no, he's not, none of you are, so shut the fuck up and stop bleeding your guts all over my ears. Have you no respect for my tears? Boisterous boys booming their bullshit across the table.
And there she is through the window. Cleaning a table. She's so nice. Doing her job like that. Just like the smile she wiped over me. Excellent customer service. That's all she's doing, her job. It's not her fault I'm invisible.
I want to leave now, so I do, walking out the glass sliding door I pass more pretty people alfresco. I stick my thumbs nail inside the hole of the car key where the button should be and I press its insides. The synchonised flash of orange to my eyes lets me know I touched it deep enough as I hear it unlock, the sound slides through my chest, I love it. In the car that knows me, before starting the engine, there is a moment when even my tears fall away from me. Even they are together.
Then you call. I catch them in my palm and smile at the way they pool and swirl into each other not knowing they were ever separate. They're happy like that. I am happy. Hearing your sweet voice through the silence makes me overwhelmingly, happy.
I will come here again.