#diarylog

3 posts
  • chidera 21w

    I am hurting but no one will ask me why
    Or if I am okay
    Or if their actions are okay
    Or if I deserved what I got

    I am suffering for waking up
    And finding a bloody knife in my hands
    They are bleeding and say I hurt them
    But I don’t know how I did or meant to

    I am hurting but no one will have mercy
    They think I am okay cause I don’t bleed
    They make plans and I nod in atonement
    They’re moving on while I’m moving mad.

    CN
    24.08.21
    16.46

  • chidera 21w

    Let’s take things back to the way they are
    The time has run its course
    Our path have become diverged roads
    All things have come to an end
    &
    Happiness lies on a new map.

    CN
    24.08.21
    16.38

  • chidera 21w

    They come to you for their sake
    They smile at you just to have something
    They care about you because it helps them

    When you don’t have
    When they can no longer profit
    When their aim isn’t the end goal

    They fall back
    They keep silent
    They retrace steps

    You sit there wondering
    You walk with confusion
    You sleep with unrested fears

    People want something from you
    And so they do things just to get it
    It is not about you but their own goal

    And you live and laugh oblivious
    Thinking someone cares about you
    Believing it was all meant for your good

    When you discover the new reality
    You are not mad. You are not angry.
    You understand it was for their own good.

    You realise that it was hurtful for them too
    And you’ll let it go. You’ll ignore the pain inside.
    Although you feel bad, you’ll wish them happiness.

    But you’ll trust people and let them in less
    Wonder why they never considered you and
    Never know who will stay nor why they stay.

    CN
    24.08.21
    16.31