The perfected dance floor,
The rivulting lights,
The jazz music,
Its illusion and the fun.
I see the young girls,
Invited by the fun,
Captivated by the ambience.
They tap their legs,
On the rhythm,
Giving into their hunger,
They forget their loneliness.
Is this the hell? I ask myself.
I then meet a girl,
Younger than my age,
A beauty that remains untouched,
Her sleek bones, her slim waist,
Her black hair, her tattoo,
Almost tells me a story.
I register it to myself,
"She is the caricature of the night."
She walks on the dance floor,
As the vibe calls her into it,
They implore her to unleash her feminity,
And that's what she does,
Her sexy dance, her body vibrating,
She now becomes
A music to all their hearts,
Their penis now asking for attention,
They pounce on her,
Touching her everywhere,
I wouldnt have liked it, I say out loud,
But the young girl seem to enjoy it all.
Does she not know - they are ravaging,
Every inch of her body,
Does she not know - she is a tool,
But only to forget,
A while after then their touch
Will be so alien for me,
I feel disguisted but then she looks at me.
Blinking her eye, she says,
"I know whats happening to me."
Whats happening to her, I then ask.
"I cherish it all,
The call, the touch,
Their hands, my body.
This is how i enjoy,
Just like a nightmare.
It is my moment to let it go,
My only way,
To forget my pain."
After a while,
She sits besides of me,
I feel uncomfortable in her sadness,
Her darkness pierce through my skin
She now cocks her head and says,
Something is happening to me.
I tell her she is hurting.
I lay my hand onto hers,
She doesnt like it.
Instead she pulls me into her arms,
I get scared hoping that its not a sexual embrace,
Instead, she smiles an innocence,
"You dont belong here,
You are not one of them
Leave while you can."
Yet, i am still there,
My eyes staying all awake.
She smiles again,
Knowing i am supposed to see it all
Sipping down a drink,
Her sultry moves on all the floor,
Inviting lot of hands caressing her waist,
I wont say she enjoy it now,
But now the girl is gone as i see her no more.
Is this the hell?
I ask my friend,
A bartender in the same nightclub,
He is out here enjoying the demons,
Its 4.a.m. now I say.
A perfect time to greet your lover,
A perfect time to meet her in your arms,
But he stops me in the middle,
"The perfect person exists no more."
I see deep sadness in his eyes,
Even though i feel something changed in him.
The diamonds of tears have sharpened
To make him something
He was never meant to be.
He still smiles at me, almost catching my thoughts,
"This is my heaven, this is my life,
I belong here now, but someone you dont.
So why you just dont leave."
I sit alone now,
Sad and depressed,
Knowing everyone i know
In their own version of hell,
Indulging in their own fantasies
But i see their pain, i see their demise,
I see their helplessness,
Their feelings of lost,
I know these feelings could never be mine.
A good Samaritan then walks to me,
Smiling he just looks at me,
I can never forget that smile,
But i did forget the cap he wore on his head,
I find him content and calm,
As how he is and as how he should be,
Looking at him, intrigued,
I am amazed that i was never
Introduced to his kind,
He understands me,
He says something, placing his hand on my head,
"You dont belong here, little sister,
You are a beacon of light and hope,
An immersive eyes that you have,
And the smile that could heal the tears,
Go to your tribe, leave this place my friend,
You belong to them and not somewhere here."
I look at him and give him a smile
For I see a belonging on his face,
About the tribe I am supposed to be with,
He speaks again,
"One day I will crash your abode
When renuka mauli have provided
You with everything you deserve,
To unite and fulfill with your purpose."
Thats when i greeted him
A cue that he gave to me,
This could never be me,
Nor this could be my place to stay.
I look at my cellphone,
I see the text,
"Are you home,
Where have you reached?"
Thats when i know
This is my soul tribe,
And this is my time
To return home.
And leave the hell i indulged in.