#abusiverelationship

58 posts
  • vintagepneuma 51w

    You didn't see the tears
    Streaming down my cheeks,
    Burning my skin.
    You missed out the scars you left
    On my cover,
    Running all over it.
    You closed your eyes
    To my pains,
    My sufferings.
    You chose your dark desires
    Over me, over us
    Without fail.
    You said you were out of love,
    Out of every emotions
    You once had for me.
    "I'm confused.
    Sorry. I love you", meant nothing
    After the episodes you had with me.

    Blood oozing, joint broken.
    Eyes swollen, lips bitten.
    Hair chopped, wobbled walk.
    Senses lost,
    unconscious, I dropped.
    Is this what you call
    "Love" ?
    Is this how you want my trust ?
    Thrashing me till I bleed out?
    Colour red—
    Solace to your heart.
    "Sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you.
    Forgive me, I care for you."
    Believing it was so hard
    But loving you was the easiest.
    The guilt and ache crushing me down,
    And soon I was declared lifeless.

    ©vintagepneuma

    Feel free to point out any mistake.

    @miraquill @writersnetwork @writersbay
    #hurt #abuse #abusiverelationship #toxic #love #lovelife #writers #readers #lovequotes #ddevspeaks #blood #death #toxicity #life #mirakeewriters #wordporn #trust #mirakeeworld #writeup #poets

    Read More

    If only I loved you enough
    OR
    If only you cared enough..

  • fatbitshifs 59w

    The First bruise

    There's that look in his eye
    He doesn't blink
    He doesn't think
    Something shuts off in him
    The dark iris of his eyes gleams like a blackwater lake
    A predator waiting to pounce
    The first time was unexpected
    I didn't know whether to move or duck or scream
    When my face felt the impact, I realised what seeing stars in daylight meant
    Bubbles of light bursting in my eyes
    The sharp pain on the right side of my head and face
    I have been slapped before
    I have harsh parents
    But this time I felt what true hatred executed felt like on your face
    My legs disappeared
    I sank to the ground
    I couldn't see or hear or breathe
    The silence I hear from that ear he touched seems so heavy
    Palpable
    I hear church bells and a choir laughing at me
    Surely all this didn't happen
    The world had ended
    But I didn't die
    His footsteps ran away from me
    My face was now wet with shame and tears
    My head throbbing trying to make sense of why I lay there in the dirt at night abandoned
    Denial is a dangerous game
    Why must the world be so cruel
    You find the monsters of your nightmares in people you chose to love
    ©fatbitshifs

  • ppghose 102w

    Hollow....

    The staff members around her, were rejoicing.
    Professor Sengupta had given a brilliant seminar on Prevention of Domestic Abuse.Fellow professors applauded her on the corridors and staircases.She walked swiftly through all that commotion , looking down and smiling.She rushed outside the campus and caught a taxi.
    While inside the taxi, she rolled back her sleeve, the knife cut from last evening was still fresh under the surgical dressing.She couldn't process her fame anymore.Despite her fame,education and stable finances ,she felt hollow over her life choices.Nothing made sense.
    ©ppghose

  • preetchettri 107w

    Love

    Abusive relationship and the person who abuses sucks, have you been in a situation where u crawled up in the sheets and cried to bed, have you ever felt you're in love but the other person treats you like shit just bcoz you love them, hits you, kills you with their words, abusers are shy they show all the good from the outside and are clever and cunning from the inside, they are a manipulative piece of shit you will ever see, they can be disguised as caring, protective and loving you but in reality, they aren't and even when you try to dump them they come as blackmailers...stop clinging to them because at the end of the day you will have the same feelings as I did..happy on the outside sad in the inside because the impact they leave in your life is scary, No matter how much they loved you, cared for you once an abuser always an abuser. And no amount of love can change that, abusive behaviour is in their veins.
    ©preetchettri

  • avika_amby 107w

    #abuse #dominance #bullying #abusiverelationship # bounceback #selflove #selfconfidence #victornotvictim #survivor #positive #stronger #unbreakable
    @mirakee #inspirational
    All of us have lessons in life. This is one of the chapters from mine.

    He broke me,
    But he didn't see,
    That when I got up,
    There was a stronger me.

    He told me his childhood was sad,
    With a sad who would beat,
    And a mom who'd look the other way,
    So,a child was so meek

    At 19,this child became my baby,
    I took him in while I was younger than him,
    Believing that that's the right thing to do,
    Bring up a man as if he were a toddler,
    Even when he was 20,he would behave as if he were 2.

    First came the tantrums, the usual sulking,
    And then how my family and friends were the evil lurking,
    How he managed to isolate me,
    Was a skill that hid behind that charm,
    His words were bitter,
    But I still believed he would do no harm.

    Then,when I lost all about me,
    Suddenly he was the only one to run to,
    The only one to cry to in my time of need.

    It is a sickening feeling
    when you get bullied for being
    an emotional fool,
    For caring so much,
    Because you stood,
    He had bow friends who joined him for you,
    And by the same person who had no one to begin with,
    I was the one left with hardly a few.

    You begin to be used,
    Abused in ways you never thought possible,
    All in the name of love

    There are scornful looks if you talk to a boy,
    A blue eye here,a twisted arm there,
    Just to teach a lesson,
    Not because you aren't loved,
    But because you fail to understand the depth of that love.

    What you do is wrong,
    Because you took so long,
    What you didn't
    Is worse,
    Because your absent mindedness is a curse.

    You begin to explain to people
    How walking into doors and windows is a very common affair,
    And cry into the pillow,
    With blood in your hair.

    He loves me,
    And I failed him,
    Is what the usual response is.
    He didn't mean to hit me,
    I just worked him up to the T.

    Of course, there's love,
    Of one and for one alone.
    The other gets called the joker,
    The joke I become.
    The day you try to break away,
    There are rumours made that you went astray

    Suddenly, you are the promiscuous,
    The evil within the womb
    It was always you,
    Who played victim because you had nothing better to do.

    So, I broke away,
    As he broke me,
    If death be the end of it all,
    Let me fight it this once and see,
    Locking all the doors,
    Switching off the phones,
    Cutting off from the world was not my solution to be


    Face it,
    And I faced him,
    Told him he will pay for his sins,
    But that's not for me to decide,
    I am leaving,
    Carrying on and leaving this negativity aside.

    He could kill me right then,
    But this girl wasn't ready to take this pain lying down,
    And it takes a strong grasp on your self belief
    That does the talking for you,
    And it took me four years to see myself through.

    But all this,
    did leave a gap in my senses,
    With anxiety and overthinking
    Always leaving me in a crowd,
    Alone on the side benches.

    The hurt and pain on the body,
    slowly begin to fade and
    As does the memory of the name and number that was your sole identity placard
    But what remains is the reaction that fear engraved in you
    That reaction kicks up against any act around you,
    No matter how untrue.

    So, you begin to push people away,
    All the fighting for naught,
    All the strength comes to a halt.
    Your instincts become fearful,
    Every chance is a glass half full,

    It takes time,this fear to quell itself
    By getting love from the ones who matter,
    Heals this darkness,
    And you put your experiences away
    Somewhere on the bookshelf.

    But the only way to escape this stress
    Is not escape it at all.
    I needed to tell myself,
    This is my rise and that was my fall.

    And over time we begin to realise,
    It was only my love for me,
    That mattered most of all.
    ©avika_amby

    Read More

    He Broke Me

    He broke me,
    But he didn't see,
    That when I got up,
    There was a stronger me.

    He told me his childhood was sad,
    With a sad who would beat,
    And a mom who'd look the other way,
    So,a child was so meek

    At 19,this child became my baby,
    I took him in while I was younger than him,
    Believing that that's the right thing to do,
    Bring up a man as if he were a toddler,
    Even when he was 20,he would behave as if he were 2.

    First came the tantrums, the usual sulking,
    And then how my family and friends were the evil lurking,
    How he managed to isolate me,
    Was a skill that hid behind that charm,
    His words were bitter,
    But I still believed he would do no harm.

    Then,when I lost all about me,
    Suddenly he was the only one to run to,
    The only one to cry to in my time of need.

    It is a sickening feeling
    when you get bullied for being
    an emotional fool,
    For caring so much,
    Because you stood,
    He had bow friends who joined him for you,
    And by the same person who had no one to begin with,
    I was the one left with hardly a few.

    You begin to be used,
    Abused in ways you never thought possible,
    All in the name of love

    There are scornful looks if you talk to a boy,
    A blue eye here,a twisted arm there,
    Just to teach a lesson,
    Not because you aren't loved,
    But because you fail to understand the depth of that love.

    What you do is wrong,
    Because you took so long,
    What you didn't
    Is worse,
    Because your absent mindedness is a curse.

    You begin to explain to people
    How walking into doors and windows is a very common affair,
    And cry into the pillow,
    With blood in your hair.

    He loves me,
    And I failed him,
    Is what the usual response is.
    He didn't mean to hit me,
    I just worked him up to the T.

    Of course, there's love,
    Of one and for one alone.
    The other gets called the joker,
    The joke I become.
    The day you try to break away,
    There are rumours made that you went astray

    Suddenly, you are the promiscuous,
    The evil within the womb
    It was always you,
    Who played victim because you had nothing better to do.

    So, I broke away,
    As he broke me,
    If death be the end of it all,
    Let me fight it this once and see,
    Locking all the doors,
    Switching off the phones,
    Cutting off from the world was not my solution to be


    Face it,
    And I faced him,
    Told him he will pay for his sins,
    But that's not for me to decide,
    I am leaving,
    Carrying on and leaving this negativity aside.

    He could kill me right then,
    But this girl wasn't ready to take this pain lying down,
    And it takes a strong grasp on your self belief
    That does the talking for you,
    And it took me four years to see myself through.

    But all this,
    did leave a gap in my senses,
    With anxiety and overthinking
    Always leaving me in a crowd,
    Alone on the side benches.

    The hurt and pain on the body,
    slowly begin to fade and
    As does the memory of the name and number that was your sole identity placard
    But what remains is the reaction that fear engraved in you
    That reaction kicks up against any act around you,
    No matter how untrue.

    So, you begin to push people away,
    All the fighting for naught,
    All the strength comes to a halt.
    Your instincts become fearful,
    Every chance is a glass half full,

    It takes time,this fear to quell itself
    By getting love from the ones who matter,
    Heals this darkness,
    And you put your experiences away
    Somewhere on the bookshelf.

    But the only way to escape this stress
    Is not escape it at all.
    I needed to tell myself,
    This is my rise and that was my fall.

    And over time we begin to realise,
    It was only my love for me,
    That mattered most of all.
    ©avika_amby

  • acclaim_stories 111w

    Do you remember the colours of our life?
    I was black and you were white.
    When You painted me red, tears that I shed,
    When You painted me green, I was afraid to scream
    When You painted me blue, I thought you love me too,
    When you painted me yellow, you never let me grow,
    When you painted me orange, you thought only about revenge,
    When you painted me brown, my presence made you frown,
    When you painted me black, you made me feel dead.
    The colours you gifted to me in my life,
    I would remember and regret
    For being your wife.

    @writersnetwork #deadpoetsociety #abusiverelationship #husbandandwife #mirakeewriters

    Read More

    .

  • jacob_howdagee 116w

    Skipping Stones

    I saw the first ripple in the lake
    He caressed you in your fall
    But you did not wish to stay

    You skipped along
    Pursuing love on higher depths
    Last I saw, you were falling
    More than I could've guessed

    Your little stone heart
    Isn't skipping now
    What has you sinking down? 

    The darkness clasps your heart
    Tightly in his hands
    What a terrible man

    Does the pressure above
    Keep you below? 
    But in those cold hands
    Don't you feel alone? 



    ©jacob_howdagee

  • sleepysadpoet 119w

    14

    I was 14 and coping with razorblades.
    You were 17 and hating everything.
    You hated life so much that you had to make me hate it too.
    I picked myself apart for months after it was over because everything I did reminded me of you.
    I still heard your voice in my head, telling me everything wrong with me as if I didn't know before.
    Sometimes I still hear it and it makes me hate me more.
    I was 14 when you taught me how to want to die.
    I was 15 when you said I had to lie.
    Tell them it was an accident.
    Say it never happened.
    ©sleepysadpoet

  • tylerbertrand 123w

    "love"

    perhaps i've been sleeping too little
    and not drinking enough
    my bottle's empty
    but i got plenty
    of vodka in my cup

    perhaps i've been thinking too much
    and not pretending a lot
    my mind's too white
    but i think might
    undo my thoughts

    maybe i don't like you anymore
    maybe i never had
    but even in my worst days
    in the worst ways
    you made me laugh

    maybe i have you in my mind
    not in my heart
    but my thinking got
    me worrying
    about your love.

    ©tylerbertrand

  • bipolarbeautyqueen 134w

    Mommas slippin

    Feels like I'm facing the heaviest shit all on my own
    standing in the down pour, floors sinkin' in my home
    Same dvds on repeat five months now, still I've been discrete
    Ants in my morning coffee, nothing in the fridge but at least my daughter eats
    That's all I care about, that's what makes me stand on my feet in the AM when I wished I would have died in my sleep.
    Can you tell me how?
    How to rise and not fall down?
    I'm trippin' out, momma's slippin' now, I can hear 'em now...
    "Look from where she came, I knew she wouldn't make it, such a shame"
    Where is everyone as I sit in this rain, smoking my last cigarette,
    Wishing today had not have came?
    Pure silence all through the day,
    Nothing to turn on I'm going insane.
    Cleaning boats and my baby's laughter are my only break from what haunts me.
    Since my first breath I was mediocre, trying to climb the bar
    Being below average has always been hard...
    Cold water I am submerged trying to keep my head above it, bills due tomorrow
    The letters keep piling in, none of it endearing, definitely not an old friend
    Just another source that needs something from me, I give and give from what's never even been whole
    It's beyond my reach
    Standing on my tiptoes jumping towards the upper crust, always close but never touch
    I'm disdappearing I'll turn to dust
    Grabbing my knees, crying in the shower just because
    Smiling as the tears roll down
    So that she doesn't know,
    So that she doesn't see
    She's the most important and she needs a strong mommy
    Under water, tossing violently
    Choking, coughing trying to breathe
    Fighting the world, the world is fighting me
    Sewn and woven into my mind, every time my heart was broken my entire life, if you'd have felt it...
    Had seen it for yourself, I won't say...
    But I had to get help
    Trapped in a rockslide, tumbling down low, my eyes lost the sky
    It's dark and dirt keeps piling on top of my aching body, heavily it does no good to breathe
    Momma's slippin', can't you see?
    My lungs burn like the end of this last cigarette now there's no air
    Momma's slippin', don't you care?
    Dear Lord, I know you're there, I know you're there... I know you're there
    My shoulders hurt, it's too heavy, it's too much weight to bare
    "When will it be lifted?", I said the other day
    Then I heard "Momma"
    And got out of bed, tucked it all away, made a bottle, continued to pray
    I'm down on my knees, my knuckles together grippin', lift me up, lift me up...
    This momma is slippin'

  • pyro_sagen 137w

    Leave

    I push you out but you always come back
    You've overstayed your welcome
    How thin do I have to be before you'd think of anyone but yourself.

    You promised me so many things but your lies dont taste as sweet anymore.
    Do I have to bury you 6ft under the dirt to be rid of you.

    Your voice causes me pain and your touch that I used to love has become the thing I hate most.

    I'd rather you hit me and tell me you hate me than be smothered in your false affection
    I told you I needed you to leave. But you never do.

    I'd rather starve than eat what you offer me
    Theres nothing more here for you to see
    Please let me starve alone
    Please let me be
    ©through_a_rabbits_eyes

  • lazzzyyyybugggg 141w

    Even though molested . Some people try hard to keep their relationship going . But every thing has a limitations .
    #abusive #relationship #tolerant #molestation #abusiverelationship @mirakee @writersnetwork @readwriteunite

    Read More

    USed
    abUSed
    misUSed
    pUShed
    crUShed
    roUSted
    excUSed
    confUSed

    Tolerated it all. Endeavored to keep us as US. But it's enough. can't be lenient anymore.

    ©lazzzyyyybugggg

  • tylerbertrand 142w

    i know i should've fought harder
    cared more
    even valued your love
    and followed your orders

    i know i should've made it clear
    said more
    even stopped the storm
    and faced my fears

    i know i should've missed it
    ignored more
    even made you sure
    and know where i sit

    oh, i know you should've seen
    noticed more
    even if it tore
    and split me in between

    you knew i knew and you did nothing about it.

    ©bonsai

  • rohan_the_rantbox 143w

    COURAGE

    I walked out of that abusive relationship.
    I broke that door.
    No one has the right to use me and abuse me.
    I difficult step but freedom is now forever.
    ©rohan_the_rantbox

  • katherinemartin 147w

    Attention
    You say I did it all for attention
    I saw the look in your eye, heard the hesitance in your voice
    Because to you, feeling this way was my choice
    Excuses, thats what my pain was to you
    When you were an excuse of a human, nothing about you was true
    "Its not all my fault" you told me
    When did I ever say it was?
    No, you're clinging to the wrong side of the tree,
    You're too blind to see that you were perfect to me
    I looked at you like you were a dove
    A sign of peace, sent from God above
    But all you did was slap a smile on exploitation and called it love
    I tell myself daily that I've moved past you
    Which, for a fact, is true
    But the horrors you did to me are still unraveling in front of me
    I discover more each day
    How your sick manipulation effected me, more than I can say
    Cause you left me speechless, boy
    I am NOT some worthless toy
    It angers me from the inside out that while you smile peacefully as you slumber
    My mind is a roaring thunder
    A crashing lightning storm of every terrible thing you got me to do
    And I gave in, because no one else knew
    About the four soundproof walls I had built
    Around my screaming mind
    And still, I thought you were so kind
    You made me convince myself I was happy
    And didn't want me when I was anything less than
    Your entertainment, your relief from a long day
    Your pleasure in all the wrong ways
    You made my mind a disgusting place
    Because its always filled with your hideous face
    The memory of you abusing your power as a man
    Spins around my mind like a record player
    Do you wanna tell girlfriend that you're a lying scoundrel?
    Because I sure can
    My entire view of men is a shattered romance
    Because you couldn't keep your fucking dick in your pants

    Was that truly all I was to you?
    How many months, eight?
    Just some juicy flesh you could bite into?
    And still, somehow, you convinced me, that this was my fate
    We never went on one true date
    Without you trying to suffocate my innocence
    For a glimpse of that disgusting white substance
    How clean, really, is your conscience?
    Is it because somehow, you inforced my silence?
    Well, not anymore, dickhead
    Its about time my story is read

    You never hit me or raped me, so therefore I thought
    Maybe it WAS my fault, all the times we fought
    Did you think you'd maneuvered me enough to not get caught?
    No, honey. Our relationship is actually what taught me
    That looks almost always decieve

    Do you truly not see, I wonder?
    That you beat me down like cake batter?
    Do you not remember
    That your sick brain sat me down each night
    And told me to be nothing but bright?
    Cause my depression and anxiety to you
    Were nothing more than mere stones in your shoe
    An annoyance, as you later admitted to me
    I never knew that loving all of me had such a fee
    Now I know that all you wanted was outward beauty
    But...now I wonder, could anyone truly love me, for me?

    I'd never felt more trapped in my life
    Cause when I mentioned our breakup, to your neck was a knife
    And I was petrified
    That I would cause the slice

    I tried to explain that I couldnt fix you
    But you were set on me making you good as new
    I dont have the power for that, why did you think I did?
    Good thing that now, farewell to you I bid
    How DARE you threaten to take your life?
    How DARE you cause me to battle my own mind?
    Is that how you're going to treat your future wife?

    Finally, the last thing I'd like to say to you
    After all is said and done, I forgive you
    Because clinging to your hopeless corpse of a mind
    Would simply repeat that time of being blind
    I cant wait until the things that you do
    Come back and punch you in the same throat that would spew
    Nothing but negativity, anger and lies
    So, confidently, I'm saying right now that I could look you in the eyes
    Glance up and down at the pitiful sight
    And beg God that you just might
    In the battle of you against you, win the fight.
    ©katherinemartin

  • whystayimnotokay 148w

    The Maid

    Your sharp tounge etched my bones. every word you said, hit me like stones.
    You kicked me.
    You violated me.
    You broke me.
    You used me.
    I woke up with bruises from you hitting me in my sleep. You didnt even care, youd just watch me weep.
    Im not your fucking maid!
    "Make yourself useful and go do the dishes" thats not how you talk to a person! It broke me from within. You broke my self esteem. You were supposed to be on my team....Your mom never liked me. When i left she was happy. She talked shit on me my on my birthday at the party she threw for me, which already made me uncomfortable. She treated me like rubble. I didn't know anyone at my own party. Everyone spoke a language i dont understand. How is that fair!? Is that what she planned? ..You broke me the moment we got chores. You forgot what its like to be in love. And started kicking me like you were some person who belonged above. YOU DONT GET TO look down on me anymore. There is the door! It sucks i dont have you sleeping next to me everynight, (hahaha not really) but its fine, you were just a boy, using me like a toy, now i have a man. He gives me everything he can. And just wants us to be happy. And i do the same and we both feel a little less crappy. I'd give him the world if i could. He knows i would.

    ©whystayimnotokay

  • aquivere 149w

    slapped

    by now blood tastes sweet like cherry juice
    their screams are nothing more than christmas laughter
    kindness is nothing more than spit on your face
    the falling of dishes and broken glass feels like a symphony
    and each time the moon sleeps
    you shake like a leaf
    and each time the sun awakens
    it starts all over
    ©aquivere

  • avika_amby 152w

    #abuse #dominance #bullying #abusiverelationship # bounceback #selflove #selfconfidence #victornotvictim #survivor #positive #stronger #unbreakable
    @mirakee #inspirational
    All of us have lessons in life. This is one of the chapters from mine.

    He broke me,
    But he didn't see,
    That when I got up,
    There was a stronger me.

    He told me his childhood was sad,
    With a sad who would beat,
    And a mom who'd look the other way,
    So,a child was so meek

    At 19,this child became my baby,
    I took him in while I was younger than him,
    Believing that that's the right thing to do,
    Bring up a man as if he were a toddler,
    Even when he was 20,he would behave as if he were 2.

    First came the tantrums, the usual sulking,
    And then how my family and friends were the evil lurking,
    How he managed to isolate me,
    Was a skill that hid behind that charm,
    His words were bitter,
    But I still believed he would do no harm.

    Then,when I lost all about me,
    Suddenly he was the only one to run to,
    The only one to cry to in my time of need.

    It is a sickening feeling
    when you get bullied for being
    an emotional fool,
    For caring so much,
    Because you stood,
    He had bow friends who joined him for you,
    And by the same person who had no one to begin with,
    I was the one left with hardly a few.

    You begin to be used,
    Abused in ways you never thought possible,
    All in the name of love

    There are scornful looks if you talk to a boy,
    A blue eye here,a twisted arm there,
    Just to teach a lesson,
    Not because you aren't loved,
    But because you fail to understand the depth of that love.

    What you do is wrong,
    Because you took so long,
    What you didn't
    Is worse,
    Because your absent mindedness is a curse.

    You begin to explain to people
    How walking into doors and windows is a very common affair,
    And cry into the pillow,
    With blood in your hair.

    He loves me,
    And I failed him,
    Is what the usual response is.
    He didn't mean to hit me,
    I just worked him up to the T.

    Of course, there's love,
    Of one and for one alone.
    The other gets called the joker,
    The joke I become.
    The day you try to break away,
    There are rumours made that you went astray

    Suddenly, you are the promiscuous,
    The evil within the womb
    It was always you,
    Who played victim because you had nothing better to do.

    So, I broke away,
    As he broke me,
    If death be the end of it all,
    Let me fight it this once and see,
    Locking all the doors,
    Switching off the phones,
    Cutting off from the world was not my solution to be


    Face it,
    And I faced him,
    Told him he will pay for his sins,
    But that's not for me to decide,
    I am leaving,
    Carrying on and leaving this negativity aside.

    He could kill me right then,
    But this girl wasn't ready to take this pain lying down,
    And it takes a strong grasp on your self belief
    That does the talking for you,
    And it took me four years to see myself through.

    But all this,
    did leave a gap in my senses,
    With anxiety and overthinking
    Always leaving me in a crowd,
    Alone on the side benches.

    The hurt and pain on the body,
    slowly begin to fade and
    As does the memory of the name and number that was your sole identity placard
    But what remains is the reaction that fear engraved in you
    That reaction kicks up against any act around you,
    No matter how untrue.

    So, you begin to push people away,
    All the fighting for naught,
    All the strength comes to a halt.
    Your instincts become fearful,
    Every chance is a glass half full,

    It takes time,this fear to quell itself
    By getting love from the ones who matter,
    Heals this darkness,
    And you put your experiences away
    Somewhere on the bookshelf.

    But the only way to escape this stress
    Is not escape it at all.
    I needed to tell myself,
    This is my rise and that was my fall.

    And over time we begin to realise,
    It was only my love for me,
    That mattered most of all.
    ©avika_amby

    Read More

    He Broke Me

    He broke me,
    But he didn't see,
    That when I got up,
    There was a stronger me.

    He told me his childhood was sad,
    With a sad who would beat,
    And a mom who'd look the other way,
    So,a child was so meek

    At 19,this child became my baby,
    I took him in while I was younger than him,
    Believing that that's the right thing to do,
    Bring up a man as if he were a toddler,
    Even when he was 20,he would behave as if he were 2.

    First came the tantrums, the usual sulking,
    And then how my family and friends were the evil lurking,
    How he managed to isolate me,
    Was a skill that hid behind that charm,
    His words were bitter,
    But I still believed he would do no harm.

    Then,when I lost all about me,
    Suddenly he was the only one to run to,
    The only one to cry to in my time of need.

    It is a sickening feeling
    when you get bullied for being
    an emotional fool,
    For caring so much,
    Because you stood,
    He had bow friends who joined him for you,
    And by the same person who had no one to begin with,
    I was the one left with hardly a few.

    You begin to be used,
    Abused in ways you never thought possible,
    All in the name of love

    There are scornful looks if you talk to a boy,
    A blue eye here,a twisted arm there,
    Just to teach a lesson,
    Not because you aren't loved,
    But because you fail to understand the depth of that love.

    What you do is wrong,
    Because you took so long,
    What you didn't
    Is worse,
    Because your absent mindedness is a curse.

    You begin to explain to people
    How walking into doors and windows is a very common affair,
    And cry into the pillow,
    With blood in your hair.

    He loves me,
    And I failed him,
    Is what the usual response is.
    He didn't mean to hit me,
    I just worked him up to the T.

    Of course, there's love,
    Of one and for one alone.
    The other gets called the joker,
    The joke I become.
    The day you try to break away,
    There are rumours made that you went astray

    Suddenly, you are the promiscuous,
    The evil within the womb
    It was always you,
    Who played victim because you had nothing better to do.

    So, I broke away,
    As he broke me,
    If death be the end of it all,
    Let me fight it this once and see,
    Locking all the doors,
    Switching off the phones,
    Cutting off from the world was not my solution to be


    Face it,
    And I faced him,
    Told him he will pay for his sins,
    But that's not for me to decide,
    I am leaving,
    Carrying on and leaving this negativity aside.

    He could kill me right then,
    But this girl wasn't ready to take this pain lying down,
    And it takes a strong grasp on your self belief
    That does the talking for you,
    And it took me four years to see myself through.

    But all this,
    did leave a gap in my senses,
    With anxiety and overthinking
    Always leaving me in a crowd,
    Alone on the side benches.

    The hurt and pain on the body,
    slowly begin to fade and
    As does the memory of the name and number that was your sole identity placard
    But what remains is the reaction that fear engraved in you
    That reaction kicks up against any act around you,
    No matter how untrue.

    So, you begin to push people away,
    All the fighting for naught,
    All the strength comes to a halt.
    Your instincts become fearful,
    Every chance is a glass half full,

    It takes time,this fear to quell itself
    By getting love from the ones who matter,
    Heals this darkness,
    And you put your experiences away
    Somewhere on the bookshelf.

    But the only way to escape this stress
    Is not escape it at all.
    I needed to tell myself,
    This is my rise and that was my fall.

    And over time we begin to realise,
    It was only my love for me,
    That mattered most of all.
    ©avika_amby

  • katherinemartin 152w

    you took exploitation, slapped a smile on it and called it love

  • heenajoshi 152w

    Hope is not a tyre,
    Which could be punctured.
    But my heart is.
    And mockery is your needle.
    But hope is like Harry’s 9.3/4 platform.
    Not easily visible,
    But always there.
    ©theinsaneink