I have always been sensitive while discussing a serious topic like Marriage. Yeah it is not what shown in Tv or media. It is one of the biggest step which would effect your whole life and hearafter.. Decision like such should never be taken only while taking into account trivial things like one's looks or bank balance! No there is more to a person than what appears to be. My heart get nervous whenever someone talks about proposal. It is not something i run from, it is something i want to consider with utmost care. And not in any haste, or thinking from the mind of others. Or taking any decision just to shut the voices of people around. Or accepting it because girl is now graduated. I have seen people eagerly accepting the proposal just becuz they want to get married, all they think of fun enjoyment and fantasy, they develop happily everafter kinda psych probably keeping aside all the responsibilies coming with it...! all thanks to media. And some get married as an obedient child of their parent. Being obedient is good but doesn't mean you do not use your own senses and simply follow others. It should be mere your own decision, taken from complete choice and will. It is ok to say "No" if you feel so. No one is coming to deal with the things once you get married. No one is going to take responsibily what you faced ahead, and no one is going to see if you're happy or crying with your life.
I've lost people I never wanted to.Somewhere it was all my fault.I got attached,too attached that when they left,they took a part of me. I haven't healed,never will,but I've accepted the truth and that, no matter how hard you try,you can't make people stay,you can't make them love you.
At the end,they all leave and once again,I'm sitting all alone by myself.
Everyone is selfish,I know that by now but stupid heart just doesn't understand.It still cares,loves and lives.
Why can't I be cruel just like them? Why can't I just stop caring? Why do I keep forgiving those I shouldn't? Why do I put them before me? Why do I stay when I should leave?
Cause simply,Its not me.Its not in my heart to see someone in pain because of me.I can't hurt people,I simply can't.
I don't like who I am becoming..I never liked me I guess.Self-love they say but its hard,its not so easy when everyday you look at yourself and cry. Those eyes are never dry,those wrists are not like yours.
Its hard to act everyday that nothing's wrong,that you're okay when you are breaking,when that hope to live just dies and you know, it can't come back. I don't want to tell this to anyone cause I know nothing will change,that they will all leave and even if they won't,I am scared.
Sometimes its better not to talk,about anything to anyone.
I am tired of being let down. I am tired of all these lies. I am tired of getting hurt. I am tired of my all insecurities. I am tired of living. I am tired. I have lost all form of happiness.
I'll always be that girl you will find smiling,who will never show the mess she is in,the girl who will say she is fine when she is numb.
The girl who chose to live even when there was nothing left
Strong hearts can break too but as said, Broken people blossom into warriors.
You are survivor. You are a fighter. You are a warrior.