a girl delusional enough to think she can touch hearts with her words

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  • ayushi_joshi 138w

    Forgive me

    I wish I could tell about the tears I shed

    Writing those last texts cursing myself in my head

    Breaking your heart wasn't something easy for me

    But I didn't want to leave any entry for thee

    Forgive me for all the apologies I couldn't make 

    Forgive me for all the right steps I couldn't take

    Understand me for the words I couldn't say

    Forgive me for I didn't have the strength to stay


  • ayushi_joshi 140w

    This one's for the things that feel right but aren't

    And for the thoughts which even I feel are incoherent

    And for the guilt that I everyday suppress 

    In the quest of clearing my head space

    Trying hard to identify those thin lines

    Waiting for the destiny to give some signs

    Or to tell me who decides what's right and what's wrong

    Cause it feels so right b what is supposed to be wrong

    Tell me where to stop cause I'm blind to these blurring lines

    All this so new just give me some guidelines

    It's my head or my heart I'm just caught in the middle

    Isn't there some way to just solve this riddle

    For this confusion is constantly eating me all day long

    Just tell me who gets to decide what's right and what's wrong


  • ayushi_joshi 140w

    For a moment I felt like I lost  you 

    Just like the little droplets of dew

    Which stays for a while beautifying the morning 

    And disappears leaving behind nothing

    Won't tell you I am lonely for it maybe selfish

    Won't ask you to hold me as it won't mend what's helpless

    For I have come to terms with the reality which's sad

     I can't lose something  that I never really had 

  • ayushi_joshi 156w

    At lonely  starry  silent nights

    When people turn off their lights

    I often wonder how things ended

    And how we were both left wounded

    I remember the late night talks

    Also the endless long walks

    Something still always felt amiss

    Something that tainted this bliss

    I never understood what was it

    And no answer ever seemed fit 

    It wasn't because I didn't love you

    Hard to believe but it's still true

    After these many years I've realized 

    And the answer has left me surprised

    So you should stop blaming thyself

    As it was because I didn't love myself


  • ayushi_joshi 157w

    If only love would have been in a person
    But a pity that it's just an emotion
    For we blame modern love everyday
    That it has gone quite astray
    If only it could defend itself
    Being a human would have been a help
    For then love could say it's not me it's you Come I'll tell you about the real issue
    For back then it was about caring
    Now it has became about appearing
    The feeling of respect is long long gone
    You fake your smile tear and even your moan
    You tell me that I have gone astray
    Yet you lie to them everyday
    You blame me for your failure
    Take peek in your behavior
    Yet you blame me cause it's easier that way
    Than to admit that it's you who's astray
    Good for you that love is just an emotion
    Now you can drawn your mistakes in an ocean
    Now you can continue blaming everyday
    That the modern love has gone astray


  • ayushi_joshi 168w

    They often say that clothes doesn't make a man
    That's what they that clothes doesn't make a "man"
    For a woman is always judged on her clothing
    "You shouldn't wear anything that's too revealing "
    "Oh girl! You look so uncool all covered up"
    "Why do you put on so much make-up? "
    Why do you look so dull, plain and dry
    You can't please everyone no matter how hard you try
    The things they say are nothing but a lie
    Be anything you wanna be bold or shy
    They'll say be yourself be natural
    But look pretty and presentable
    Let Me Tell You This
    Do nothing against your wish
    It's okay if you wanna change the body that you came in
    As long as you're happy and confident it is a win
    Put on that blood red lipstick that you were afraid to use
    For you can do and be anything and no one can refuse
    Be anything you wanna be or stay the way you are
    And then the days of oppression will be gone long long far
    Take that step you that always wanted to
    You only live once so make your dreams come true


  • ayushi_joshi 180w

    A guy who came in her life unexpectedly
    You will be amazed to know he is friendly
    Unexpected encounters are the best
    She was captivated under his arrest
    He made her feel pretty and beautiful

    Compliments he gave her were bontiful
    How can one be so mesmerising
    At all times it's is surprising
    Unlocking something which was hidden
    Her heart had hid it as something forbidden
    And as he came he unlocked the box
    No doubt this guy really really rocks


  • ayushi_joshi 182w

    A guy with a golden heart
    So pay attention as i start
    He came with soothing ears
    I talked to him about my fears
    Selflessly he heard me out
    Heard my unsaid call out

    Soothing my pain by his assuring words
    Optimistically hitting emotional chords
    Late night it was but it felt so bright
    And reached to an emotional height
    Nice guy with a pure soul
    Know that he'll do no foul
    I wish him all the good things in the world


  • ayushi_joshi 187w

    For nobody needs a smile so much as those who have none left to give!

  • ayushi_joshi 187w

    "A huge friend circle she has" they exclaimed
    And thus her lonliness could not be explained
    For there was something her soul still craved
    The road she walked was completely unpaved
    Direction less, she was but not motion less
    Moving with grace without showing the stress
    It took every ounce of courage
    To keep the pain in storage
    A storage which was kept hidden
    And where everyone was forbidden
    But now storage is running out of space
    Impossible to continue with a poker face