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  • awfully_quiet 1w

    I was wrong about so many things..
    About how everything that I feel can be put into music.
    How there is a place for everybody where
    solitude can solve all the problems.
    How clarity is communication
    Talking it all out, breathing in and out..
    How the only thing that matters is "me"
    And reading all the quotes about it.
    And darkness can always be my best friend
    Unconditional as it seemed,
    Man, did it feed on my suspicions.
    And I was wrong..
    About how I thought I knew
    Love..
    Love will surprise you
    And maybe,
    Just maybe that's what they mean when they say
    That you fall in love a little bit more everyday.
    Because you will..

    And you won't write about all of it..
    Because that's how deeply you will want it to be yours.
    Just yours.

    ©awfully_quiet

  • awfully_quiet 1w

    It's not that I see it in my dreams every night. Or that everytime I close my eyes, I transcend to that place. Not that easy.
    Quite honestly, there is not one person, not one thing here that I'm not afraid of. The phrase "safe haven" that I fell in love with right after reading it on the cover of the Nicholas Sparks book, I started etching it in the sun rays through the window...any window.
    I could say that my childhood was tough and maybe it was, I'm not going to put it on the pedestal to be judged, but it was what it was. I now know that there is immense fear behind anger, there's someone crying in the kitchen sometimes and you'll have to let them, there is repentance in the lavish weekends and the laughter. I now know that kids absorb, literally absorb bits of us as they watch us. How we respond to stress, anger, joy, love..
    And all of that.. has me trembling in fear..
    But there is a line..A simple, thin line between the things we know and the things we think we know, I am afraid of that.
    And it's not going to go away...

    ©awfully_quiet

  • awfully_quiet 1w

    Not in flowers or fires
    Or anywhere in the skies
    Or the great, great writers' capacity
    There is no picture in my head
    Ever created, ever contained
    Better than the ones your eyes see.
    No words that feel right,
    None that my heart lets flow
    Other than the ones you speak, insinuate, write, sing-
    Your control
    Slow and steady
    Or a rush, against the wind
    Underneath your weather,
    Everytime you let me take control.
    Bathed in you,
    Wherever I stay,
    Wherever I go.


    ©awfully_quiet

  • awfully_quiet 3w

    It's never easy and it never got any easier
    One half of me is you
    And you leave this place empty in so many ways,
    I never had the heart to count them all.
    My poison that looked at me with love
    Right when you looked at me with love
    Takes over and makes me believe
    You can't not be disgusted by who I am.
    And I fight it.
    I fight with all my might.
    That's how far I ever get by myself.


    ©awfully_quiet

  • awfully_quiet 4w

    To the only thing I even know anymore:

    Wherever it is where hearts are meant to be held,
    Maybe a little warmth will go off now..
    And I'll be an old thing repeating itself.
    Telling the same stories again..
    But wherever it is where hearts are meant to be held,
    Yours will glow with the dim one of mine..
    Always like the day it began
    And you turned me around..
    Enchanted by the way you did absolutely anything..
    Just way too deeper from within..
    Somewhere nobody can speak about..

    ©awfully_quiet

  • awfully_quiet 4w

    To the ones who are going to complain about how I don't meet halfway anymore:

    I have my eyes closed,
    I don't see what you're doing anymore.
    I left out the side door.
    It was breaking my heart to reach out
    Like I could hear the branches breaking under my feet
    And you said you'll be that bridge if I needed someone.
    It hurts a little less to be alone
    Than to be invisible afterall.
    I was never one with grace.
    I was never innocent.


    ©awfully_quiet

  • awfully_quiet 7w

    Repetition of thoughts. But so is the night.

    Read More

    I hope the night is faithful to you
    And kinder than ever
    Hoping that it is
    Will be the next best thing
    To the hypnosis of watching you drift away
    As you take with you those heavy eyes

    And the ruffling of the sheets
    Those blessed sighs,
    As the white background noise..


    Until at some point
    I do too maybe

    ©awfully_quiet

  • awfully_quiet 8w

    He bought the book. She saw the brown bag he was holding around his fingers as he shut the door behind him.
    He pulled one of his gloves off with his teeth and gave her the bag with the other hand.
    "Here. Open it."
    The brown paper was clean and uncreased.
    "I don't want to. It's so pretty." She held the book close to her chest.
    "Right. Give that to me." Keeping both his gloves in his pocket, he tried taking it away from her but couldn't.
    "NO! Calm down. I'll open it." She walked towards the table where the plates were all set and the food was waiting on them. "Freshen up, first. I'm hungry."
    He rushed upstairs and rushed back down after a few minutes. He had changed into more comfortable clothes. He sat down the dinner table before dragging the other chair closer to him. "You sit here and open that thing right now. I'll serve."
    She quickly unwrapped the brown paper and there it was.
    "Woah." He put the spoon in her mouth and kissed her cheek.
    "We start with this one tonight."
    "Tonight? We haven't read a book in ages. We don't read. We look at all the pretty books, oh the hardcovers and drool over them before we trick ourselves into buying them."
    "Tonight." He said without a pause.

    He was waiting for her inside their blanket as she crawled over to his arms.

    After a little while they both lay on their bellies with the book between them.
    She held his hand away from it so he wouldn't flip the pages too fast because he always did.
    He made sure that the blanket stayed on top and covered them at all times.

    ©awfully_quiet

  • awfully_quiet 8w

    He doesn't know..
    And maybe that's what makes these tears warmer.
    The clutching of the heart much firmer.
    He doesn't know..
    The shift in the figure of speech
    The tidal loss of words
    The center of my universe.
    He doesn't know..
    The reason for the bloom in my heart
    The rush in my head
    The clarity in belief.
    He doesn't know..
    A lot of me.
    He does know..
    He owns that lot of me.
    He doesn't know..
    It's all him.


    ©awfully_quiet

  • awfully_quiet 9w

    We'll walk..
    Midnight..
    Under the changing billboard lights.
    Reach the empty lit up crossroads
    Pause and you'll remember that you can pull me close
    Closer to your height.

    Or we'll dance
    Or just move back and forth
    Call it slow dancing
    In the refrigerator light
    To your favourite songs
    As you let them do the talking
    Late at night..

    After all the uncertainties
    The beating down
    As we try to keep our head high
    Shoulders straight
    My medicine
    My crazy in love sanity
    Infinite in the finite..


    ©awfully_quiet