still exploring myself
You and me
I don't know when I can Ever break from the chain of feelings you have createdMay be I miss youAnd may be I lack your warmthBut I guess it was never meant to be Really we have hurt each other a lot Don't you agree ?I guess we are far less related than strangersStrangers that once knew no bound would ever separate them But now look at us We both are hurting I don't know when will I move on from your memoriesI am trying to break free from the chain of my feelingsI need to hold myself up againI need to search myself again©ahsila
Though I have missed you for so long I can't talk to youThough I have missed your warmthness I can't beg youThough I have wanted you I can't have youThough my life is crumbling without youI can't even see youIt's been a lots of ups and downs I don't know how I will be holding this without you©ahsila
Would it ?
Sometimes i wonder Would my life be better If I had made the right decisionWould it be peaceful If I had the courage to accept myselfWould it be purposefulIf I had the right mindsetWould my life be happierIf I had try to be a little more like myself©ahsila
Sometimes the situations are too overwhelmingI broke down in pain in utter silenceHiding from everyoneHoping if only I was enough©ahsila
I have distanced myself from mePretending to be alrightPretending to be fine Now its too blurred thatI can't even recognize myself
I guess it's too hard to forget youNo matter how much I try Your stupidity your smile haunt me every second Every day is a struggle between me and your memoriesYou have been deeply engraved your presence in my lifeI guess I really miss the warmthness you hadThe smile you worethe jokes you madeBut in the end Everything faded except these feelings are left with meI guess I don't really miss youI miss the feeling of being with you.
Someday it feels as if I don't deserve to be happy And that's the reason why I am not happy©ahsila
I have created so many ways To hurt myself deeper than ever©ahsila
Well the strange part is It all didn't matter How I wanted things to be What I hoped and expected forIt turned out the way I have never wantedAnd now its all messedMessier it's gettingHow am I supposed to cope with thisThe world seems to be shrinking for meConstantly trying to find my way through itI shattered myself into pieces searching for happiness.©ahsila
To whom should I tell The feelings I have hidden The pain I have been feeling The heaviness everyday I feel when it hits the nightAll the flaws and scars I bearAll the mistakes and hope I have in my life I sat in the corner of the starry night wonderingTo whom should I tell about myself©ahsila